Don't tease a pregnant woman

I have been very tired, cranky, and uncomfortable all day today. So Paul comes home from work and I'm telling him what all went on today and I mention that the Tewksbury tax appraiser stopped by because Home Depot had pulled a permit on our house to install new windows. In the course of her visit (which occurred outside) she wants to go over what they have on record for our house.

4 bedrooms--check
1 fireplace--check
no sheds, patios, or decks--check
1 full bath, 1 half bath--uhhhhhh check (lie)
unfinished basement--uhhhh check (lie)

Paul says, "You can go to jail for lying to them." Straight face, no smile. And I say, "What?!?! Please tell me you're lying." And he doesn't say anything so I start crying and by crying I mean bawling hysterically and he starts laughing hysterically which only makes me cry harder except I have a mouth full of beef stew and I'm crying too hard to chew and swallow. And he makes it worse by saying "You'll be out of jail by the time the baby is born." And I think I'm totally screwed now, gonna get caught, and get in trouble (we all remember the parking garage incident) so I keep crying and Paul keeps laughing.

Finally he gets over his hysteria and wipes his eyes (yes, he laughed to the point that he had tears coming down his face) and I'm able to slow my crying enough to chew and swallow and blow my nose. I eventually was able to stop crying and finish my dinner once Paul told me I would NOT get into trouble.

So what did we learn this evening? Paul cannot tease me at all until after I give birth and laughing makes it worse. Moral of the story: Don't tease a pregnant woman!