So, you may have read my post about being on the fat belly diet. To try to compensate for my M&M overdose today I planned on going to the gym when I got home. I opened the mud room door, walked inside, and thought "Hmmm, the cat must've just taken a dump."
I opened the kitchen door and thought "OMG what died in here?" I cautiously approached the dining room where the dog cages are and then I see it....
SASHA's, our 80lb boxer, is COVERED with diarhea of epic proportions. And the smell is AWFUL!!!! I slowly back away and go back into the mud room, covering my mouth/nose with my hand, while I figure out how I'm going to tackle this problem.
I go back inside and put the dogs in the backyard. I then have to put the kitchen table so that I can get to the cage. Do you know how big a dog cage is for an 80lb dog? As I struggle to get this dog cage from the diningroom, through the livingroom, and out the front door the pan from the bottom of the cage slides out and lands on my shoes...the pan that is COVERED IN DOG POO. So, then I try to climb over the dog cage so I carry it from the other side, stopping the pan from sliding out, and back out the front door.
Did I also mention that its about 40 degrees and raining out? So, I have to get the hose, turn the faucet on (which sprays all over the place), and hose off the cage. By the time I was done I couldn't feel my fingertips anymore.
Back into the house for the fun part...an entire roll of papertowels later I had cleaned up the dog poo. I then had to steam clean the entire kitchen and hallway to the front door.
Then I let the dogs back into the house and thought "Hmmm Sasha wallowed around in her own filth all day. Perhaps a bath is in order." So, then its all the dogs into the tub which calling Jojo, the Boston terrier, into the bathroom he looked like dead man walking. I laughed so hard!
Jojo, Beast, and Beauty got their baths first and then I let them shake off and then I tried to get Sasha into the tub. Of course Sasha is having none of that so picture me trying to lift an 80lb boxer into the tub. We finally got situated, I'm bathing Sasha, and Jojo freaking barks...Sasha leaped out of the tub like her ass was on fire and landed on top of me. So, then it was my turn for a bath (well, shower anyways).
Just call me Jenny the Poo!
PS I also got my new passport photo today. Let me just say that I typically get stopped at the airport and searched or my luggage searched or I get held up in some way. My new passport photo in which I actually look like a terrorist will ensure this trend continues. I may actually go get another picture taken tomorrow because its BAD. Really bad.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
The Fat, I mean flat, Belly Diet
This week I made attempt #4 at the flat belly diet. Keep in mind that the first phase is only 4 DAYS and I have FAILED miserably at every attempt.
Day 1:
Breakfast:
Flat belly diet: 1 cup unsweet corn flakes, 1 cup skim milk, 1/2 cup unsweet applesauce, 1/4 cup unsalted sunflower seeds, sassy water
I ate: I already knew I wasn't gonna drink the sassy water because it is disgusting. I have given up drinking milk. So I had unsweet applesauce and a spoonful of salted sunflower seeds. And coffee.
Lunch:
Diet: 4 oz organic deli turkey, 1 low fat string cheese, 1 pint of grape tomatos, sassy water
I ate: a salad bar salad with feta cheese, cheddar cheese, croutons, and ranch dressing, 2 slices of turkey, a few tomatos (seriously do you know how many grape tomatos are in a pint? like a thousand) and later on had a string cheese for a snack
Oh, and you are supposed to have fruit smoothies as an afternoon snack. Yeah, that'd work well with my job.
Dinner:
Diet: 1 cup green beans, 4 oz tilapia, roasted red potatos, sassy water
I had: green beans, roasted red potatos, and tilapia and bread with butter and ice cream
Day 2:
Breakfast:
Diet: rice krispies, milk, sunflower seeds, pineapple tidbits, sassy water
I had: unsweet applesauce, coffee
Lunch:
Diet: 3oz light tuna in water, 1 cup steamed baby carrots, low fat string cheese, sassy water
I had: a personal pan pepperoni pizza and breadsticks from pizza hut and a dr. pepper.
Dinner:
Diet: sauteed mushrooms, 3oz grilled chix breast, brown rice
I had: a turkey breast, brown rice, and ice cream
Day 3:
Breakfast: cornflakes, skim milk, sunflower seeds, 2 tbsp raisins, sassy water
I had: unsweet applesauce, coffee
Lunch: 4oz turkey, string cheese, 1 pint of grape tomatos, sassy water
I had: veggie lo mein with 4 crab rangoons and an egg roll and a dr. pepper and for a snack m&m's
Dinner:
Diet: green beans, turkey breast, roasted red potatos, sassy water
I had: velveeta shells and cheese
Apparently I have been on the FAT belly diet. Silly me!
Day 1:
Breakfast:
Flat belly diet: 1 cup unsweet corn flakes, 1 cup skim milk, 1/2 cup unsweet applesauce, 1/4 cup unsalted sunflower seeds, sassy water
I ate: I already knew I wasn't gonna drink the sassy water because it is disgusting. I have given up drinking milk. So I had unsweet applesauce and a spoonful of salted sunflower seeds. And coffee.
Lunch:
Diet: 4 oz organic deli turkey, 1 low fat string cheese, 1 pint of grape tomatos, sassy water
I ate: a salad bar salad with feta cheese, cheddar cheese, croutons, and ranch dressing, 2 slices of turkey, a few tomatos (seriously do you know how many grape tomatos are in a pint? like a thousand) and later on had a string cheese for a snack
Oh, and you are supposed to have fruit smoothies as an afternoon snack. Yeah, that'd work well with my job.
Dinner:
Diet: 1 cup green beans, 4 oz tilapia, roasted red potatos, sassy water
I had: green beans, roasted red potatos, and tilapia and bread with butter and ice cream
Day 2:
Breakfast:
Diet: rice krispies, milk, sunflower seeds, pineapple tidbits, sassy water
I had: unsweet applesauce, coffee
Lunch:
Diet: 3oz light tuna in water, 1 cup steamed baby carrots, low fat string cheese, sassy water
I had: a personal pan pepperoni pizza and breadsticks from pizza hut and a dr. pepper.
Dinner:
Diet: sauteed mushrooms, 3oz grilled chix breast, brown rice
I had: a turkey breast, brown rice, and ice cream
Day 3:
Breakfast: cornflakes, skim milk, sunflower seeds, 2 tbsp raisins, sassy water
I had: unsweet applesauce, coffee
Lunch: 4oz turkey, string cheese, 1 pint of grape tomatos, sassy water
I had: veggie lo mein with 4 crab rangoons and an egg roll and a dr. pepper and for a snack m&m's
Dinner:
Diet: green beans, turkey breast, roasted red potatos, sassy water
I had: velveeta shells and cheese
Apparently I have been on the FAT belly diet. Silly me!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Messages in unexpected places
I was completely overwhelmed and disheartened and stressed out by all I have to do at work when I left at the end of the day. I regretted scheduling an end of the day appointment at a state hospital, but since it's on my way home thought I'd be able to run in and out quickly.
When I got there the person I see was wandering away from the desk area and someone called out to him that I was there. I said hi and he said let's go. We went down to the basement to get coffee and then he wanted to sit outside. He's not very talkative and much of our visits are me talking about whatever I can think of. I often wonder how much of what I'm saying is really taking in although he does on occassion joke around with me.
We spent about 35 minutes together and it was time for him to go back up to the unit. In the elevator he thanked me for coming to see and when I replied that I enjoyed our weekly visits he stated, "I don't get many visitors." It took all my self control not to start crying in the elevator. When we got up to the unit I asked him to sign the paperwork I've been bringing with me for a month, but with the caveat that I'd still come see him even if he signs these papers. And he signed. I think he had hesitated because he was afraid by signing that it would mean the end of our work together. And when I got in my car I cried.
As a society we often forget the forgotten. Those people who are left in hospitals or nursing homes or institutions or group homes who have no family, no friends, and whose whole life is played out in the 4 walls that surround them. For me, a work assignment with someone who is known to be difficult has turned into a life affirming moment. For him, someone coming to see him because she was told to has become someone that he looks forward to seeing every week.
It is amazing how when you are down and out God smacks you across the face in a big way. You never know what impact you are having on someone, what difference you are making in someone's life.
His favorite food is fried clams (I learned that today) and I am going to get him some fried clams. Everyone deserves a little joy in their life and I can do that much. And there will be someone else in my prayers tonight.
When I got there the person I see was wandering away from the desk area and someone called out to him that I was there. I said hi and he said let's go. We went down to the basement to get coffee and then he wanted to sit outside. He's not very talkative and much of our visits are me talking about whatever I can think of. I often wonder how much of what I'm saying is really taking in although he does on occassion joke around with me.
We spent about 35 minutes together and it was time for him to go back up to the unit. In the elevator he thanked me for coming to see and when I replied that I enjoyed our weekly visits he stated, "I don't get many visitors." It took all my self control not to start crying in the elevator. When we got up to the unit I asked him to sign the paperwork I've been bringing with me for a month, but with the caveat that I'd still come see him even if he signs these papers. And he signed. I think he had hesitated because he was afraid by signing that it would mean the end of our work together. And when I got in my car I cried.
As a society we often forget the forgotten. Those people who are left in hospitals or nursing homes or institutions or group homes who have no family, no friends, and whose whole life is played out in the 4 walls that surround them. For me, a work assignment with someone who is known to be difficult has turned into a life affirming moment. For him, someone coming to see him because she was told to has become someone that he looks forward to seeing every week.
It is amazing how when you are down and out God smacks you across the face in a big way. You never know what impact you are having on someone, what difference you are making in someone's life.
His favorite food is fried clams (I learned that today) and I am going to get him some fried clams. Everyone deserves a little joy in their life and I can do that much. And there will be someone else in my prayers tonight.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Emily will be so proud of me!
Tonight was the start of Hookslide Kelly's spring 5k series and Paul has been pressuring me for weeks to run. I've mostly ended up on the side of NOT GONNA HAPPEN during these discussions. All day long I thought about this 5k and on my way home from work had pretty much decided I was not going to slog. Even as Paul was getting dressed to run I was saying that I wasn't going to run, but that maybe I would do my own thing during the 5k (as in walk or something off the route).
During the car ride I realized my feelings towards the race were not rooted in an inability to complete a 5k, but rather in a lot of feelings of intimidation and lack of confidence in myself. So then after more discussion I thought I would run.
As we parked the car and started to walk towards the bar to register I had amazing amounts of anxiety (sweaty palms, heart racing, pit in my stomach) and I realized I had to complete this 5k in order to overcome my anxiety. Plus it helped that Paul paid my entrance fee (okay, it was only $10, but I didn't want to waste my money on something that might kill me).
You can go ahead and call me LL Cool J because the lesbians love cool Jenn...I immediately find my fan club and they are encouring! And the starting gun is fired and everyone is off. I actually kept pace with the ladies for a good while before I stopped to walk. The whole 5k I kept saying to myself that I completed 51 miles of the Breast Cancer 3 Day so I got this.
I finished in 42:20 (weird since today is 4/20). Paul met me within the last 1/2 mile to encourage me in (I have the best hubby ever). The best part was that I didn't feel like I was going to die! Last year when I ran in the summer series I was crying and wanted to throw up at the end. Improvement! And my lesbian fan club was waiting at the end to give me high fives!
Paul and I walked back towards the bar and he ran up into the parking garage to get money so we could eat. As I waited for him (I knew I wasn't going to be able to climb 3 flights of stairs...I'm not that stupid) I thought that I should've had him grab my ID. I mean we were eating dinner at a bar...what I wanted a cocktail? And so I said to him when he got down that I should've had him grab my id and my little enabler had gotten it out of my wallet already! I knew I married him for a reason.
Of course after my dinner of Greek salad, potato skins, and beer (and water, too) I whined about wanting to throw up all the way to the car (which we got to by elevator, NOT the stairs).
So, we'll see if I can walk tomorrow, but I can say that I definitely feel I successfully slogged my way through my first 5k of the series. Go me, go me, go me!
During the car ride I realized my feelings towards the race were not rooted in an inability to complete a 5k, but rather in a lot of feelings of intimidation and lack of confidence in myself. So then after more discussion I thought I would run.
As we parked the car and started to walk towards the bar to register I had amazing amounts of anxiety (sweaty palms, heart racing, pit in my stomach) and I realized I had to complete this 5k in order to overcome my anxiety. Plus it helped that Paul paid my entrance fee (okay, it was only $10, but I didn't want to waste my money on something that might kill me).
You can go ahead and call me LL Cool J because the lesbians love cool Jenn...I immediately find my fan club and they are encouring! And the starting gun is fired and everyone is off. I actually kept pace with the ladies for a good while before I stopped to walk. The whole 5k I kept saying to myself that I completed 51 miles of the Breast Cancer 3 Day so I got this.
I finished in 42:20 (weird since today is 4/20). Paul met me within the last 1/2 mile to encourage me in (I have the best hubby ever). The best part was that I didn't feel like I was going to die! Last year when I ran in the summer series I was crying and wanted to throw up at the end. Improvement! And my lesbian fan club was waiting at the end to give me high fives!
Paul and I walked back towards the bar and he ran up into the parking garage to get money so we could eat. As I waited for him (I knew I wasn't going to be able to climb 3 flights of stairs...I'm not that stupid) I thought that I should've had him grab my ID. I mean we were eating dinner at a bar...what I wanted a cocktail? And so I said to him when he got down that I should've had him grab my id and my little enabler had gotten it out of my wallet already! I knew I married him for a reason.
Of course after my dinner of Greek salad, potato skins, and beer (and water, too) I whined about wanting to throw up all the way to the car (which we got to by elevator, NOT the stairs).
So, we'll see if I can walk tomorrow, but I can say that I definitely feel I successfully slogged my way through my first 5k of the series. Go me, go me, go me!
Monday, April 19, 2010
I live to slog another day
As I sit here recovering from my slog, listening to the sound of gun fire (from what I hope is someone target shooting in their backyard) I wonder, "Where the hell were you when I was slogging?" I would've totally welcomed a shot to the leg and would've thanked you profusely for ending my misery because I realized as I slogged along today that I. HATE. RUNNING.
Let's back up a step. I hate it so much that I have lost the will to even care what I look like as I slog. Case in point...today I appeared to have been dressed by a blind person in a white long john material type shirt with blue sleeves, black pants with pink stripes down the sides, my blue/grey kicks, and a yellow hat. Actually a blind person probably would've dressed better than I do.
So I'm slogging along thinking about how much I hate it and I come to realization #2: I'm just gonna be overweight. I'm gonna get my nails did (cause have you ever noticed that overweight people always have the best nails), I'm gonna do my hair everyday, I'm gonna buy clothes that fit me in the correct size instead of trying to squeeze my size 16 into a 12 because I'm too cheap to buy new clothes and I keep thinking I'm gonna lose weight, and I'm gonna embrace my love of food and wine.
So I slogged down to Main St. (with much walking along the way) and I'm on my way back (with walking punctuated by a brief jog across an intersection if a car was there) when I see a house that must've had $15,000 worth of landscaping done today. I mean there were 5 landscape trucks there. Some guys were still out front (and let me say I ain't never seen landscapers that looked like these in Florida) so I say, "Wow...gasp for air...looks...gasp...really...gasp...good." He may have thought I was the handicapped child that the street sign says lives in the area.
Now let me emphasize...I wouldn't run if someone was chasing me with a chainsaw so imagine my dismay when I come up on the gaggle of turkeys that live in our neighborhood. 8 freaking huge turkeys. Turkeys are mean and these sons of bitches are walking across the road in front of me. And I know I can't outrun these turkeys and they know I can't outrun them. So I pick up a rock and throw it at one of the turkeys hoping to scare them away. I accidentally hit one of them which only enrages it. So, I see a a branch lying in the yard next to me and I pick it up and prepare to defend myself. Imagine the fight scene from West Side Story....except it's me versus 8 turkeys. The lead turkey starts coming towards me so I start swinging the stick around my head and run towards the turkey. As the turkeys turn tail and run I stand, victorious, in the middle of the road screaming at their retreat,
"Gotcha suckers!"
Let's back up a step. I hate it so much that I have lost the will to even care what I look like as I slog. Case in point...today I appeared to have been dressed by a blind person in a white long john material type shirt with blue sleeves, black pants with pink stripes down the sides, my blue/grey kicks, and a yellow hat. Actually a blind person probably would've dressed better than I do.
So I'm slogging along thinking about how much I hate it and I come to realization #2: I'm just gonna be overweight. I'm gonna get my nails did (cause have you ever noticed that overweight people always have the best nails), I'm gonna do my hair everyday, I'm gonna buy clothes that fit me in the correct size instead of trying to squeeze my size 16 into a 12 because I'm too cheap to buy new clothes and I keep thinking I'm gonna lose weight, and I'm gonna embrace my love of food and wine.
So I slogged down to Main St. (with much walking along the way) and I'm on my way back (with walking punctuated by a brief jog across an intersection if a car was there) when I see a house that must've had $15,000 worth of landscaping done today. I mean there were 5 landscape trucks there. Some guys were still out front (and let me say I ain't never seen landscapers that looked like these in Florida) so I say, "Wow...gasp for air...looks...gasp...really...gasp...good." He may have thought I was the handicapped child that the street sign says lives in the area.
Now let me emphasize...I wouldn't run if someone was chasing me with a chainsaw so imagine my dismay when I come up on the gaggle of turkeys that live in our neighborhood. 8 freaking huge turkeys. Turkeys are mean and these sons of bitches are walking across the road in front of me. And I know I can't outrun these turkeys and they know I can't outrun them. So I pick up a rock and throw it at one of the turkeys hoping to scare them away. I accidentally hit one of them which only enrages it. So, I see a a branch lying in the yard next to me and I pick it up and prepare to defend myself. Imagine the fight scene from West Side Story....except it's me versus 8 turkeys. The lead turkey starts coming towards me so I start swinging the stick around my head and run towards the turkey. As the turkeys turn tail and run I stand, victorious, in the middle of the road screaming at their retreat,
"Gotcha suckers!"
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Old lady in the club
Yesterday...I went to a KD brunch and then Paul and I met our friend Danielle and her faux husband Corey for dinner. Afterwards we went to a bar to play pool that was next to the restaurant. We got there probably around 8:30pm and it was empty. We played pool, watched Paul and Corey play air hockey, and I kicked Paul's ass 3 times at a basketball shoot out. As we left around midnight I looked around and realized that I, in my short sleeve sweater over a long sleeve shirt, with a peacoat on, and carrying an umbrella, had become the old lady in the club.
My 20's were filled with pre-partying, drinking, dancing, and night clubs. When I hit 30 all that changed. Well, not all because I still love to have a cocktail...except now I prefer to do it in the privacy of my own home so I don't have to wear a bra, can pee as much as I want without worrying about sitting in someone else's pee, and can wear my stretchy pants with my belly hanging out. Oh, and snacks...I always have snacks at home.
I am okay with being the old lady. I had my days, or rather nights, out and I am content now to spend time with family and friends. I don't feel the need to go out drinking for the sake of drinking anymore. I'd rather enjoy a nice dinner and good times with the people I love.
Here's another oldie:
Sunday, January 01, 2006
New Year, new start
Current mood: calm
Happy New Year! I cannot believe it is 2006 although I think that I have said that every year since 2000. My major new year resolutions are to stop sleeping with my ex and to stop whining about single. Basically just to enjoy and appreciate all the good things I do have. I have a fantastic family who loves me, fabulous friends, my "babies" (Beast and Sherman), good health, my masters, a job, a nice home, a great car, and the ability to do pretty much what I want at any given time.
I will tell you a funny (sad) story from last night though, but first we have to go back a little bit to Thanksgiving. We were at a bar Thanksgiving weekend watching a very inebriated woman dancing. She had on a track suit and flip flops. Now my close friends know that I have the ability to attract the most random individuals ever. My friends and I are on the dance floor, this woman comes up and tries to dance with me when a guy comes and grabs her hand saying, "Come on mom, let's go." That's right. I got hit on by a woman old enough to have a son over the age of 21. Fast forward to last night. Again at the same bar, dancing, and there is a couple who are probably in their 60's there with their daughter. The mother is getting her groove on (she looked like she was practicing African tribal dancing) and I lean over to my sister and say, "Come on mom, let's go." We start laughing when Mrs. 65+ grabs my hand and tries to dance with me. My bartender friend said at least I have found my target audience. I almost cried. Why can't my target audience be between the ages 28-35, attractive, with a good job? I'd even settle for reasonable looking with a job period.
I had a good time last night (despite spending the evening with my ex and his new girlfriend aka my friend first who are the most adorable couple ever--seriously you would gag). I hope everyone else thoroughly enjoyed their New Year's Eve celebrations and has started off 2006 in a fantastic way!
My 20's were filled with pre-partying, drinking, dancing, and night clubs. When I hit 30 all that changed. Well, not all because I still love to have a cocktail...except now I prefer to do it in the privacy of my own home so I don't have to wear a bra, can pee as much as I want without worrying about sitting in someone else's pee, and can wear my stretchy pants with my belly hanging out. Oh, and snacks...I always have snacks at home.
I am okay with being the old lady. I had my days, or rather nights, out and I am content now to spend time with family and friends. I don't feel the need to go out drinking for the sake of drinking anymore. I'd rather enjoy a nice dinner and good times with the people I love.
Here's another oldie:
Sunday, January 01, 2006
New Year, new start
Current mood: calm
Happy New Year! I cannot believe it is 2006 although I think that I have said that every year since 2000. My major new year resolutions are to stop sleeping with my ex and to stop whining about single. Basically just to enjoy and appreciate all the good things I do have. I have a fantastic family who loves me, fabulous friends, my "babies" (Beast and Sherman), good health, my masters, a job, a nice home, a great car, and the ability to do pretty much what I want at any given time.
I will tell you a funny (sad) story from last night though, but first we have to go back a little bit to Thanksgiving. We were at a bar Thanksgiving weekend watching a very inebriated woman dancing. She had on a track suit and flip flops. Now my close friends know that I have the ability to attract the most random individuals ever. My friends and I are on the dance floor, this woman comes up and tries to dance with me when a guy comes and grabs her hand saying, "Come on mom, let's go." That's right. I got hit on by a woman old enough to have a son over the age of 21. Fast forward to last night. Again at the same bar, dancing, and there is a couple who are probably in their 60's there with their daughter. The mother is getting her groove on (she looked like she was practicing African tribal dancing) and I lean over to my sister and say, "Come on mom, let's go." We start laughing when Mrs. 65+ grabs my hand and tries to dance with me. My bartender friend said at least I have found my target audience. I almost cried. Why can't my target audience be between the ages 28-35, attractive, with a good job? I'd even settle for reasonable looking with a job period.
I had a good time last night (despite spending the evening with my ex and his new girlfriend aka my friend first who are the most adorable couple ever--seriously you would gag). I hope everyone else thoroughly enjoyed their New Year's Eve celebrations and has started off 2006 in a fantastic way!
Saturday, April 17, 2010
So proud of my alma mater (#7)
Playboy's 2010 top 10 party schools:
#1 UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS AT AUSTIN
The Longhorns football team fell just short in the national championship game, but here’s a victory the entire school can claim a part of. We’re talking to you, bikinied coed in Devil’s Cove, and you, star wide receiver Jordan Shipley, and even the humanities library, which just purchased David Foster Wallace’s papers. When you add up academics, the weather, the liberal atmosphere, South by Southwest, game day and the nightlife on Sixth Street, UT Austin is one heck of a school. Hook ’em, Horns!
Nicole Dawn, West Virginia University#2 WEST VIRGINIA UNIVERSITY
There’s not much to do in Morgantown except party, study and ignite furniture. Seriously. Scott, a freshman, tells us, “The tailgating at our women’s soccer games beats tailgating at most other schools.” Another frosh, Jakes, claims, “We drink two percent of all the world’s beer.” We believe you, guys, but please put down the lighters and step away from the Barcalounger.
Sydney Max, University of Wisconsin-Madison#3 UNIVERSITY OF WISCONSIN-MADISON
It’s the best beer-drinking school in the country. Quote us. And with Badger sports improving (but still frustrating), the faithful show they can drown their woes in drink without rioting (take notice, WVU). U-Dub is a strong research institution that, come Thursday night, spills its students onto State and Mifflin streets, which we call Lager Nirvana.
Alexandra Ford, University of Miami Florida#4 UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI, FLORIDA
Last year’s winner slipped a few spots in the standings, and it’s our fault. Miami still has fine women and weather, not to mention an impressive 11-to-one student-to-professor ratio. But being named our number one party school became a bit of an albatross, and the man soon ramped up mellow-harshing. Don’t get us wrong, though; we’d rather raise hell here than in Philadelphia.
JoAnn Roberts, East Carolina University#5 EAST CAROLINA UNIVERSITY
ECU, your reputation does not precede you. But you boasted about your prowess (“You can’t spell parties without Pirates!”), so we had to come check out the scene. Well, we have news for the rest of the country: Greenville, North Carolina is a happening city. And the administration even provides drunk-bus shuttles from downtown to campus.
Kylie Baze, Arizona State University#6 ARIZONA STATE UNIVERSITY
We called ASU onto the carpet for its academics last year, but the Sun Devils passed our three-day-weekend test: When we visited they seriously partied from Thursday night to Sunday afternoon, then drank a pot of coffee and made it to class on time.
#7 ROLLINS COLLEGE
It’s not the size of a school, it’s the commotion its students cause when they collectively rage. Rollins, in Winter Park, Florida, is the hardest-partying small school (1,785 undergrads) in the country. Yes, it feels like a high school but one that convenes in the clubs every weekend.
Suzie Anderson, UC-Santa Barbara#8 UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA SANTA BARBARA
The Harvard of Santa Barbara—its faculty includes five Nobel Prize winners—is the perfect mix of sun goddesses, sand and studying. Chico State may get a touch higher, but UCSB grads go on to do great things after their six years in college.
#9 PLYMOUTH STATE UNIVERSITY
It’s been more than 20 years since PSU made our list, but this New Hampshire institution of higher learning is back. Four things students dig are skiing, skiing, studying and smoking pot on the lake. Welcome back to the party.
Mallory Adams, University of Iowa #10 UNIVERSITY OF IOWA
The scene in what students call Iowa Fuckin’ City is epic. And last year the football team gave the Hawkeyes a reason to celebrate. As their song goes, “In heaven there is no beer; that’s why we drink it here.”*
(*here = Iowa Fuckin’ City)
#1 UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS AT AUSTIN
The Longhorns football team fell just short in the national championship game, but here’s a victory the entire school can claim a part of. We’re talking to you, bikinied coed in Devil’s Cove, and you, star wide receiver Jordan Shipley, and even the humanities library, which just purchased David Foster Wallace’s papers. When you add up academics, the weather, the liberal atmosphere, South by Southwest, game day and the nightlife on Sixth Street, UT Austin is one heck of a school. Hook ’em, Horns!
Nicole Dawn, West Virginia University#2 WEST VIRGINIA UNIVERSITY
There’s not much to do in Morgantown except party, study and ignite furniture. Seriously. Scott, a freshman, tells us, “The tailgating at our women’s soccer games beats tailgating at most other schools.” Another frosh, Jakes, claims, “We drink two percent of all the world’s beer.” We believe you, guys, but please put down the lighters and step away from the Barcalounger.
Sydney Max, University of Wisconsin-Madison#3 UNIVERSITY OF WISCONSIN-MADISON
It’s the best beer-drinking school in the country. Quote us. And with Badger sports improving (but still frustrating), the faithful show they can drown their woes in drink without rioting (take notice, WVU). U-Dub is a strong research institution that, come Thursday night, spills its students onto State and Mifflin streets, which we call Lager Nirvana.
Alexandra Ford, University of Miami Florida#4 UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI, FLORIDA
Last year’s winner slipped a few spots in the standings, and it’s our fault. Miami still has fine women and weather, not to mention an impressive 11-to-one student-to-professor ratio. But being named our number one party school became a bit of an albatross, and the man soon ramped up mellow-harshing. Don’t get us wrong, though; we’d rather raise hell here than in Philadelphia.
JoAnn Roberts, East Carolina University#5 EAST CAROLINA UNIVERSITY
ECU, your reputation does not precede you. But you boasted about your prowess (“You can’t spell parties without Pirates!”), so we had to come check out the scene. Well, we have news for the rest of the country: Greenville, North Carolina is a happening city. And the administration even provides drunk-bus shuttles from downtown to campus.
Kylie Baze, Arizona State University#6 ARIZONA STATE UNIVERSITY
We called ASU onto the carpet for its academics last year, but the Sun Devils passed our three-day-weekend test: When we visited they seriously partied from Thursday night to Sunday afternoon, then drank a pot of coffee and made it to class on time.
#7 ROLLINS COLLEGE
It’s not the size of a school, it’s the commotion its students cause when they collectively rage. Rollins, in Winter Park, Florida, is the hardest-partying small school (1,785 undergrads) in the country. Yes, it feels like a high school but one that convenes in the clubs every weekend.
Suzie Anderson, UC-Santa Barbara#8 UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA SANTA BARBARA
The Harvard of Santa Barbara—its faculty includes five Nobel Prize winners—is the perfect mix of sun goddesses, sand and studying. Chico State may get a touch higher, but UCSB grads go on to do great things after their six years in college.
#9 PLYMOUTH STATE UNIVERSITY
It’s been more than 20 years since PSU made our list, but this New Hampshire institution of higher learning is back. Four things students dig are skiing, skiing, studying and smoking pot on the lake. Welcome back to the party.
Mallory Adams, University of Iowa #10 UNIVERSITY OF IOWA
The scene in what students call Iowa Fuckin’ City is epic. And last year the football team gave the Hawkeyes a reason to celebrate. As their song goes, “In heaven there is no beer; that’s why we drink it here.”*
(*here = Iowa Fuckin’ City)
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
In honor of baseball season...a definite golden oldie!
Keep in mind I told this story to a US Congressman, the President of VSU, and the VP of University Advancement...
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Spring training and head injuries...
Current mood: sleepy
For all you Reds fans.
I went to the Reds spring training game last night with a friend. Reds vs. Pirates. Game time 7:05pm. We go into the stadium. I buy my $6 bottle of Bud Light and we find our seats. Pirates are up to bat first. 3 outs and Reds are up. Someone bats and then Ken Griffey Junior is up. Now, I had kind of been making fun of him to my friendtalking about how he only got the job b/c his daddy's a coach, how he's always injured, etc. He gets a couple of balls and a strike and then he hits a foul. It is now 7:20pm. And I watch this ball fly up into the air and then start to make its way down towards where we were sitting. My friend stands up like he's gonna catch the ball so I'm thinking, "Oh, he's gonna catch it, oh he's gonna catch it." But as the ball continues to come closer I begin to think, "He's not gonna catch it, he's not gonna catch it." I truly believe though that it is going to go over our heads and maybe be caught by someone a couple seats down or the row behind us. This does not stop me from putting my hand on the side of my head and ducking a little though. My eyes are closer and all of the suddenEXCRUTIATINGLY BLINDING PAIN IN MY HEAD. Yes, I got hit with the baseball. Full on, not deflected by anyone grabbing at itjust straight from Ken Griffey Junior's bat to my skull. About 3 seconds pass where I do nothing except sit there with my hand attached to my head as security runs over and I hear about 300 people gasp and say, "Oh my god, that girl got hit with the ball." And then I start crying hysterically b/c I am pretty sure my hand is on fire and my skull has been split open. And of course the ball hits the part of my hand b/n my thumb and pointer finger where there is a big gap and my head. I have marks on my hand from the stitching on the ball. I didn't spill my beer though.
As we walk to the first aid station (and Ken is hitting a home run) I really feel as if I might vomit and I'm thinking about how badly I do not want to vomit in front of all these people. I am able to save it until I get to the first aid station and a trash can and then the toilet. They call an ambulance and then I am wheeled on a gurney out of the stadium. B/c that's not embarrassing at all. The very nice security guy got me a game ball (not the one that hit me thoughbastards sitting around me kept it! I sent a letter to the editor of the newspaper about it and Mr. Ken Griffey Junior will also be getting a letter).
After some x-rays and a CAT scan they determined nothing was broken and no serious head injury and I am released. But still the worst pain of my life! Seriously. Like nothing you can imagine. I feel like I got hit by a truck. I wake up to come to work today (late) and have a message from a client, "Oh my god. I was at the game last night and saw you get hit by the ball. Are you okay?" Yes, had a client sitting 2 rows behind me who saw me A) drinking a beer and B) getting hit by a baseball.
Who does this happen to? Ken, where's my autographed baseball?
Beer$6
Baseball tickets$24
ER visit$2500
Getting hit in the head by a Ken Griffey Junior baseballpriceless.
Comments from my friends...
That is the funniest and most painful thing I have ever heard!! It is truly classic and should be sent into a magazine. Love, Coll
OMG!!!! This is hilariousWell, no. Really it is NOT funny! But damn ONLY you could have something like this happen and then write it up in a way that makes everyone laugh out loud! I hope your head feels better soon. And damn the bastards for keeping your ball! Karen J
You are the funniest person I know! That has to be a karma thing, for sure. But on the lighter side, what a story for the grandkids. Lisa
I realize this makes me a bad person.... but I really wish I would have taken you up on your offer to go to the baseball game. Only you Jennifer. Only you. I really needed a good laugh. I appreciate you sharing this with me. That is truly hilarious. Jane PS I forwarded this to Ty, he will agree.
All I can say is this could only happen to you------ which was worse getting hit or knowing your client saw you drinking. But do like the statement that through it all you didn't drop the beer (after all it cost $6.00). Seriously, glad you're o.k. and some day you'll have a big story to tell your children/grandchildren but by then, they won't know who Ken Giffey, Sr. or Jr. were. Hey, keep in touch. and watch for slow (or high) flying balls) jd
oh jenn. i hope you're ok. but i have to say... i was hysterically laughing OUT LOUD while i was reading this. only you. karmic retribution for past indescretions!! Jessica
This email- Priceless! Jennifer I have not known you for long, yet I can help but think- who else would this happen to? Casey
Jennifer, ONLY YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!----you honestly need to send this e-mail to Ken Griffey Jr. because he will laugh his ass off.---I am very happy you are ok but your written account is hilarious!!!!! Dennis Corrigan
OMG - I am dying of laughter...and not cuz you got hurt, but damn can
you tell a story!! And holy cow...does that really happen to people I
know?? Ah...yes, it does!!
So glad you are ok...and so glad for the laugh!! That is one good story!! The grandkids will love it!! :) STAY AWAY FROM THE BASEBALL STADIUM!!!!! And, stop talking about Ken Griffy Jr. Alana
I don't know what to say. Bryan
Great story. John Fayman
I heard about Ken Griffey jr's savage attack on you.As a lawyer, I feel
you should sue that man for all he's worth [which is a real lot].It is
clear that by not coming over to check on you that he must have heard
you trash talking him [everything you said was true] and he was able to
swing in such a way that he willfully & intentionally & tortiously
struck you with that ball. For a small fee [25I can find you a lawyer
to sue that criminal.I would also advise you to call the Sarasota Police
Dept.& file attempted murder charges against him.The reds would support
that action because they would love to get out of their $100 million
contract w/ him & put in centerfield someone who is less evil than Ken
Griffey!!!I hope you feel ok now!!! Pete Lombardo
Now that I know you are okay, I have to say that this is the most hilarious thing I have heard in quite a while!!! If I would have been sitting next to you, I would have caught that ball though - and you wouldn't have gone through any of that. Regina
I heard about Griffey having a homerun! That's hysterical!!! Glad you're okay! Correy and Erin
Thats GREAT!! Well, not really, but you know what I mean! You know, Visa, or whatever the company is that does that commercial is having a competition and people can send in their own ideas. I think you should send it in! The might even have a video tape of you getting hit. What are the odds?! Mary
hahahahahaha, ohmygod!!! Jenn, that is horrible!!! but the joke at the end....cracked me up!! i agree with dennis, you need to send this to Kenny G........ :) Angie
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/recap?gameId=260327117 (link to article in which I'm mentioned!)
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Spring training and head injuries...
Current mood: sleepy
For all you Reds fans.
I went to the Reds spring training game last night with a friend. Reds vs. Pirates. Game time 7:05pm. We go into the stadium. I buy my $6 bottle of Bud Light and we find our seats. Pirates are up to bat first. 3 outs and Reds are up. Someone bats and then Ken Griffey Junior is up. Now, I had kind of been making fun of him to my friendtalking about how he only got the job b/c his daddy's a coach, how he's always injured, etc. He gets a couple of balls and a strike and then he hits a foul. It is now 7:20pm. And I watch this ball fly up into the air and then start to make its way down towards where we were sitting. My friend stands up like he's gonna catch the ball so I'm thinking, "Oh, he's gonna catch it, oh he's gonna catch it." But as the ball continues to come closer I begin to think, "He's not gonna catch it, he's not gonna catch it." I truly believe though that it is going to go over our heads and maybe be caught by someone a couple seats down or the row behind us. This does not stop me from putting my hand on the side of my head and ducking a little though. My eyes are closer and all of the suddenEXCRUTIATINGLY BLINDING PAIN IN MY HEAD. Yes, I got hit with the baseball. Full on, not deflected by anyone grabbing at itjust straight from Ken Griffey Junior's bat to my skull. About 3 seconds pass where I do nothing except sit there with my hand attached to my head as security runs over and I hear about 300 people gasp and say, "Oh my god, that girl got hit with the ball." And then I start crying hysterically b/c I am pretty sure my hand is on fire and my skull has been split open. And of course the ball hits the part of my hand b/n my thumb and pointer finger where there is a big gap and my head. I have marks on my hand from the stitching on the ball. I didn't spill my beer though.
As we walk to the first aid station (and Ken is hitting a home run) I really feel as if I might vomit and I'm thinking about how badly I do not want to vomit in front of all these people. I am able to save it until I get to the first aid station and a trash can and then the toilet. They call an ambulance and then I am wheeled on a gurney out of the stadium. B/c that's not embarrassing at all. The very nice security guy got me a game ball (not the one that hit me thoughbastards sitting around me kept it! I sent a letter to the editor of the newspaper about it and Mr. Ken Griffey Junior will also be getting a letter).
After some x-rays and a CAT scan they determined nothing was broken and no serious head injury and I am released. But still the worst pain of my life! Seriously. Like nothing you can imagine. I feel like I got hit by a truck. I wake up to come to work today (late) and have a message from a client, "Oh my god. I was at the game last night and saw you get hit by the ball. Are you okay?" Yes, had a client sitting 2 rows behind me who saw me A) drinking a beer and B) getting hit by a baseball.
Who does this happen to? Ken, where's my autographed baseball?
Beer$6
Baseball tickets$24
ER visit$2500
Getting hit in the head by a Ken Griffey Junior baseballpriceless.
Comments from my friends...
That is the funniest and most painful thing I have ever heard!! It is truly classic and should be sent into a magazine. Love, Coll
OMG!!!! This is hilariousWell, no. Really it is NOT funny! But damn ONLY you could have something like this happen and then write it up in a way that makes everyone laugh out loud! I hope your head feels better soon. And damn the bastards for keeping your ball! Karen J
You are the funniest person I know! That has to be a karma thing, for sure. But on the lighter side, what a story for the grandkids. Lisa
I realize this makes me a bad person.... but I really wish I would have taken you up on your offer to go to the baseball game. Only you Jennifer. Only you. I really needed a good laugh. I appreciate you sharing this with me. That is truly hilarious. Jane PS I forwarded this to Ty, he will agree.
All I can say is this could only happen to you------ which was worse getting hit or knowing your client saw you drinking. But do like the statement that through it all you didn't drop the beer (after all it cost $6.00). Seriously, glad you're o.k. and some day you'll have a big story to tell your children/grandchildren but by then, they won't know who Ken Giffey, Sr. or Jr. were. Hey, keep in touch. and watch for slow (or high) flying balls) jd
oh jenn. i hope you're ok. but i have to say... i was hysterically laughing OUT LOUD while i was reading this. only you. karmic retribution for past indescretions!! Jessica
This email- Priceless! Jennifer I have not known you for long, yet I can help but think- who else would this happen to? Casey
Jennifer, ONLY YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!----you honestly need to send this e-mail to Ken Griffey Jr. because he will laugh his ass off.---I am very happy you are ok but your written account is hilarious!!!!! Dennis Corrigan
OMG - I am dying of laughter...and not cuz you got hurt, but damn can
you tell a story!! And holy cow...does that really happen to people I
know?? Ah...yes, it does!!
So glad you are ok...and so glad for the laugh!! That is one good story!! The grandkids will love it!! :) STAY AWAY FROM THE BASEBALL STADIUM!!!!! And, stop talking about Ken Griffy Jr. Alana
I don't know what to say. Bryan
Great story. John Fayman
I heard about Ken Griffey jr's savage attack on you.As a lawyer, I feel
you should sue that man for all he's worth [which is a real lot].It is
clear that by not coming over to check on you that he must have heard
you trash talking him [everything you said was true] and he was able to
swing in such a way that he willfully & intentionally & tortiously
struck you with that ball. For a small fee [25I can find you a lawyer
to sue that criminal.I would also advise you to call the Sarasota Police
Dept.& file attempted murder charges against him.The reds would support
that action because they would love to get out of their $100 million
contract w/ him & put in centerfield someone who is less evil than Ken
Griffey!!!I hope you feel ok now!!! Pete Lombardo
Now that I know you are okay, I have to say that this is the most hilarious thing I have heard in quite a while!!! If I would have been sitting next to you, I would have caught that ball though - and you wouldn't have gone through any of that. Regina
I heard about Griffey having a homerun! That's hysterical!!! Glad you're okay! Correy and Erin
Thats GREAT!! Well, not really, but you know what I mean! You know, Visa, or whatever the company is that does that commercial is having a competition and people can send in their own ideas. I think you should send it in! The might even have a video tape of you getting hit. What are the odds?! Mary
hahahahahaha, ohmygod!!! Jenn, that is horrible!!! but the joke at the end....cracked me up!! i agree with dennis, you need to send this to Kenny G........ :) Angie
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/recap?gameId=260327117 (link to article in which I'm mentioned!)
Things that may cause me to resume drinking
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Things that may cause me to resume drinking...
Current mood: tired
So, we all know I've given up drinking for January...at least until my party on the 24th. But today...today I almost gave in. I desperately wanted a glass of wine when I got home from work. I was strong, but I think anyone could've forgiven me for my slip.
First we had a LONG night. Sasha, our boxer, was sick and barked to go out every 2 hours. I got up the first time and Paul got up every other time (it was too cold for me to get out of bed), but since I'm a light sleeper I woke up every time.
I had a LONG day. It started with saying goodbye to one of my clients who is going to rehab. She's like my fave and I wish her all the best. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I wouldn't be here when she got back, but I will make sure I say goodbye somehow before we leave.
Then I rushed home to let the dogs out and make sure Sasha was okay.
Then I drove to Tifton and spent an hour and a half with my angry client...she's a trip! She is the loudest talker ever. Imagine yelling and now imagine that is the person's regular tone of voice.
Then I met another therapist for lunch. And we had a great time! But I found out that Turner County, GA still is segregated...as in segregated proms and segregated cheerleading squads (the white girls cheer for football, the black girls cheer for basketball). 2007 was their FIRST desegregated prom! Are you f*cking kidding me? And she said the PARENTS were the ones who continue to plan these seperate proms and even though they had the ONE prom, that the parents still held seperate events. What kind of school district allows this to occur? I may have to write Oprah and get her on this case!
Then it was back to a client's house. She may have the worst children in America. I am fairly certain her children would cause the super nanny or nanny 911 to curl up in the fetal position and enter into a coma like state out of sheer horror. And this was a good day. I don't understand why the mother isn't an alcoholic. And child abuse isn't even her issue (but between us...would totally understand if it was). Imagine 3 minions of the devil...and they are only 1, 3, and 4 years old. There was kicking, biting, throwing things. There is a puppy and I'm constantly afraid I may have to try and kidnap the puppy. Everytime they go near the dog I think to myself "Run, puppy, run!" And mom said the same thing out loud!
Then I drove AN HOUR to another client's house where she started crying except it was like listening to the air being let out of a balloon for 30 minutes. Neighborhood dogs started barking. High pitched, awful noise. And I swear she talked for 30 minutes without stopping for air. And she hadn't turned the light on when I got there so it got progressively darker until finally I couldn't see to write in my notebook anymore and I had to stop her so she could turn the light on.
Then I got home and as soon as I walk into the house it smelled like something had DIED somewhere. All I can think is that Sasha had pooped in her cage and I was going to walk into a MESS. I had to put Vicks under my nose just to go in their without gagging. And what did I find when I got in there? NOTHING. I looked everywhere in the house and checked the dog. Not a thing. It was so strange! And so disgusting. I still have no idea why or what. I even looked under the bed. I was afraid one of my cats had exploded under there or something.
Then I caught up on the Real Housewives of Orange County from last night. Let me just say...
Tamra...BITCH and a bad person.
Vicki...BITCH and annoying as all get out
Jeanna...I like her
Gretchen...I'd kill someone to have her body; however, she is a gold digger and kinda slutty
Lynn...she seems okay; however, she always looks like she has a mouth full of marbles and her daughter makes me want to punch something
Laurie...miss her, wonder how she's that lucky
And the Valdosta Daily Times printed my rant, but totally changed it:
To the parents at the Steamhouse restaurant last night who refused to take their crying 2-year-old home: Take a parenting class. You ruined dinner for every person in the restaurant. Just thought you should know.
And didn't print it until today so the meaning is completely gone.
Oh well. Time go to bed so I can do it all over again tomorrow...
Things that may cause me to resume drinking...
Current mood: tired
So, we all know I've given up drinking for January...at least until my party on the 24th. But today...today I almost gave in. I desperately wanted a glass of wine when I got home from work. I was strong, but I think anyone could've forgiven me for my slip.
First we had a LONG night. Sasha, our boxer, was sick and barked to go out every 2 hours. I got up the first time and Paul got up every other time (it was too cold for me to get out of bed), but since I'm a light sleeper I woke up every time.
I had a LONG day. It started with saying goodbye to one of my clients who is going to rehab. She's like my fave and I wish her all the best. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I wouldn't be here when she got back, but I will make sure I say goodbye somehow before we leave.
Then I rushed home to let the dogs out and make sure Sasha was okay.
Then I drove to Tifton and spent an hour and a half with my angry client...she's a trip! She is the loudest talker ever. Imagine yelling and now imagine that is the person's regular tone of voice.
Then I met another therapist for lunch. And we had a great time! But I found out that Turner County, GA still is segregated...as in segregated proms and segregated cheerleading squads (the white girls cheer for football, the black girls cheer for basketball). 2007 was their FIRST desegregated prom! Are you f*cking kidding me? And she said the PARENTS were the ones who continue to plan these seperate proms and even though they had the ONE prom, that the parents still held seperate events. What kind of school district allows this to occur? I may have to write Oprah and get her on this case!
Then it was back to a client's house. She may have the worst children in America. I am fairly certain her children would cause the super nanny or nanny 911 to curl up in the fetal position and enter into a coma like state out of sheer horror. And this was a good day. I don't understand why the mother isn't an alcoholic. And child abuse isn't even her issue (but between us...would totally understand if it was). Imagine 3 minions of the devil...and they are only 1, 3, and 4 years old. There was kicking, biting, throwing things. There is a puppy and I'm constantly afraid I may have to try and kidnap the puppy. Everytime they go near the dog I think to myself "Run, puppy, run!" And mom said the same thing out loud!
Then I drove AN HOUR to another client's house where she started crying except it was like listening to the air being let out of a balloon for 30 minutes. Neighborhood dogs started barking. High pitched, awful noise. And I swear she talked for 30 minutes without stopping for air. And she hadn't turned the light on when I got there so it got progressively darker until finally I couldn't see to write in my notebook anymore and I had to stop her so she could turn the light on.
Then I got home and as soon as I walk into the house it smelled like something had DIED somewhere. All I can think is that Sasha had pooped in her cage and I was going to walk into a MESS. I had to put Vicks under my nose just to go in their without gagging. And what did I find when I got in there? NOTHING. I looked everywhere in the house and checked the dog. Not a thing. It was so strange! And so disgusting. I still have no idea why or what. I even looked under the bed. I was afraid one of my cats had exploded under there or something.
Then I caught up on the Real Housewives of Orange County from last night. Let me just say...
Tamra...BITCH and a bad person.
Vicki...BITCH and annoying as all get out
Jeanna...I like her
Gretchen...I'd kill someone to have her body; however, she is a gold digger and kinda slutty
Lynn...she seems okay; however, she always looks like she has a mouth full of marbles and her daughter makes me want to punch something
Laurie...miss her, wonder how she's that lucky
And the Valdosta Daily Times printed my rant, but totally changed it:
To the parents at the Steamhouse restaurant last night who refused to take their crying 2-year-old home: Take a parenting class. You ruined dinner for every person in the restaurant. Just thought you should know.
And didn't print it until today so the meaning is completely gone.
Oh well. Time go to bed so I can do it all over again tomorrow...
Animal House
Friday, January 09, 2009
Animal House
Current mood: weird
Let me give you a quick recap of my week.
Work was work. I have several new clients. When I called my boss, per her request, to obtain some additional information as to one new client she said, "I think he's some kind of offender." Hmmm...WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? Like a sex offender, did he kill someone, can I have some more info? She didn't know. So I gamely go to his trailer and actually think he seems quite nice (despite his lengthy criminal history) and he has a chihuahua. Well, his mom has a chihuahua. And I still cannot pronounce his name even though he told me what it was and I have it written down (far more vowels than consonants...it's like 2 names together...like if I was Jennannioeugrnnta). I also have his baby mama for a client who lives two trailers down and across the street. I almost killed myself going up and down the stairs into her trailer because they go straight up and do not appear attached to anything (such as the trailer or each other). Oh, and did I mention they shake and wobble as you step on them. She may have the worst children in America. And a puppy.
Speaking of pets...keep in mind that my Chinese Crested Beauty has to wear a diaper because she, at 6 years old, is not potty trained and feels the house is her personal toilet. After having the carpets cleaned, again, at Christmas I decided NO MORE and thus the diaper which was working great...until we went to my mom's for Christmas and my mom's dogs literally scared the piss out of Beauty...and into her diaper...twice...
Last night I'm laying on the couch and Beauty is next to me. Beast, the chihuahua, jumps up and I think "ewww Beast, you stink" and get up to let the dogs outside. Beauty doesn't come. So, I come back to pick her up and as I take off her diaper I realize her diaper is full of poop. My dog pooped in her diaper (how many people can say that phrase?). So, now I am trying to carry the dog, with her diaper still half on, not drop any poop on the carpet, and open the backdoor. I was in fact successful (although is it truly successful when your dog poops in a diaper?).
Then our cat, Simba. Simba who I was conned into taking by my college roommate. Simba who was born outside. Simba who apparently believes he is a dog and is OBSESSED with our Boston Terrier, Jojo. Simba constantly harasses Jojo, rubs against Jojo, tries to wrestle with Jojo (because he wrestles with Beauty--perhaps the funniest thing ever to be seen in history--a hairless dog wrestling with a cat). Simba also desperately wants to go outside with the dogs and scratches at the door when they're outside. Simba eats dog food despite his ever full bowl of cat food. Simba even lays sprawled out on the floor like a dog.
Don't even get me started on Beauty and Beast who physically fight when we go on walks and embarrass me beyond belief.
I know you are all jealous of my glamorous life...
Animal House
Current mood: weird
Let me give you a quick recap of my week.
Work was work. I have several new clients. When I called my boss, per her request, to obtain some additional information as to one new client she said, "I think he's some kind of offender." Hmmm...WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? Like a sex offender, did he kill someone, can I have some more info? She didn't know. So I gamely go to his trailer and actually think he seems quite nice (despite his lengthy criminal history) and he has a chihuahua. Well, his mom has a chihuahua. And I still cannot pronounce his name even though he told me what it was and I have it written down (far more vowels than consonants...it's like 2 names together...like if I was Jennannioeugrnnta). I also have his baby mama for a client who lives two trailers down and across the street. I almost killed myself going up and down the stairs into her trailer because they go straight up and do not appear attached to anything (such as the trailer or each other). Oh, and did I mention they shake and wobble as you step on them. She may have the worst children in America. And a puppy.
Speaking of pets...keep in mind that my Chinese Crested Beauty has to wear a diaper because she, at 6 years old, is not potty trained and feels the house is her personal toilet. After having the carpets cleaned, again, at Christmas I decided NO MORE and thus the diaper which was working great...until we went to my mom's for Christmas and my mom's dogs literally scared the piss out of Beauty...and into her diaper...twice...
Last night I'm laying on the couch and Beauty is next to me. Beast, the chihuahua, jumps up and I think "ewww Beast, you stink" and get up to let the dogs outside. Beauty doesn't come. So, I come back to pick her up and as I take off her diaper I realize her diaper is full of poop. My dog pooped in her diaper (how many people can say that phrase?). So, now I am trying to carry the dog, with her diaper still half on, not drop any poop on the carpet, and open the backdoor. I was in fact successful (although is it truly successful when your dog poops in a diaper?).
Then our cat, Simba. Simba who I was conned into taking by my college roommate. Simba who was born outside. Simba who apparently believes he is a dog and is OBSESSED with our Boston Terrier, Jojo. Simba constantly harasses Jojo, rubs against Jojo, tries to wrestle with Jojo (because he wrestles with Beauty--perhaps the funniest thing ever to be seen in history--a hairless dog wrestling with a cat). Simba also desperately wants to go outside with the dogs and scratches at the door when they're outside. Simba eats dog food despite his ever full bowl of cat food. Simba even lays sprawled out on the floor like a dog.
Don't even get me started on Beauty and Beast who physically fight when we go on walks and embarrass me beyond belief.
I know you are all jealous of my glamorous life...
Some oldies but goodies!
Originally written on Feb. 18, 2009:
How am I not a Playboy playmate?
Current mood: confused
I mean, besides the obvious reasons such as weighing approximately 90lbs. more than a playmate; not having huge, fake breasts; not having a flat stomach; excessive amounts of cellulite...
If you can look past those reasons, then I don't understand why I'm not Hugh Hefners next girlfriend. Yes, the thought of being physically intimate with him makes me throw up in my mouth a little, but I think, for enough money and fame, I could get over that. (And I am obsessed with knowing if he sleeps with all his girlfriends or just the main one or none of them...does anyone know???)
I certainly have the personality to be a Girl Next Door as I love to walk around naked (although most people would NOT want to see me walk around naked). I'm funny and loud and outgoing and people like me. I am less obnoxious than Kendra, smarter than Holly, and I like Bridgett so I can't say anything bad about her. I definitely am BETTER looking than the twins that he has as his next girlfriends. Even though they are from FL...yuck! He could've done better.
Maybe if I work out really really really hard at the gym (oh, and find the money to pay for liposuction and a personal chef) my new goal can be to be in Playboy. I think Paul would support that. Besides Bridgett is like 36 and I'm only 31...I got time.
I guess while I wait for my big, naked break I will continue to enjoy life here in south GA (Valdumpster holla) with my fiance...
Do you think Playboy will ever do a big girls edition? If so, I'm all over that!
PS I usually don't like to talk about my clients, but just to illustrate the differences between the races...my gay, black, female client wants to gain weigh so she can be "thick" like me (yes, she called me thick at our session today) because she thinks she is too thin and I want to be thin like her because life isn't fair! She eats like crap and doesn't exercise and has 2 kids and has a much better body than me...I guess the grass is always greener on the other side...lol.
PPS I am officially a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and can now start looking for a job in Boston!!! Oh, and I'm getting married!!!!
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Gran Torino and funny conversations
Current mood: contemplative
Paul and I have seen some good movies lately...Marley & Me, Bride Wars, and tonight Gran Torino. I have to admit I was not that thrilled about going, but since Paul so graciously took me to see Bride Wars I felt that, in the spirit of compromise, I needed to take him to see Gran Torino.
Whoa...
It was a truly fantastic movie. You know that when you are leaving a theater and everyone is absolutely silent that the movie touched people way down to their souls.
So, I sent my mom, dad, and sister a text message that said "Gran Torino is sooo good and sooo sad."
From this my dad calls and leaves me a voicemail about how he just got my message...um, yeah dad because I just sent it 2 minutes ago.
So, I call him back and he says "Oh, you're driving home? Are you having problem with the Gran Torino?"
So, I say "What?"
My dad thought my text meant that I was driving in a Gran Torino and having problems with it and was stuck on the side of the road. Hmmmmmm....luckily one of his friends was with him and explained that Gran Torino was also a movie.
But people who know what completely random associations I make should now understand where I get that trait from...poop rolling down the road anyone? A shark's tooth on a deck of a cruise ship...I mean bird poop?
Anyways, it was a truly moving, spectacular, change your outlook movie. Go see it!
How am I not a Playboy playmate?
Current mood: confused
I mean, besides the obvious reasons such as weighing approximately 90lbs. more than a playmate; not having huge, fake breasts; not having a flat stomach; excessive amounts of cellulite...
If you can look past those reasons, then I don't understand why I'm not Hugh Hefners next girlfriend. Yes, the thought of being physically intimate with him makes me throw up in my mouth a little, but I think, for enough money and fame, I could get over that. (And I am obsessed with knowing if he sleeps with all his girlfriends or just the main one or none of them...does anyone know???)
I certainly have the personality to be a Girl Next Door as I love to walk around naked (although most people would NOT want to see me walk around naked). I'm funny and loud and outgoing and people like me. I am less obnoxious than Kendra, smarter than Holly, and I like Bridgett so I can't say anything bad about her. I definitely am BETTER looking than the twins that he has as his next girlfriends. Even though they are from FL...yuck! He could've done better.
Maybe if I work out really really really hard at the gym (oh, and find the money to pay for liposuction and a personal chef) my new goal can be to be in Playboy. I think Paul would support that. Besides Bridgett is like 36 and I'm only 31...I got time.
I guess while I wait for my big, naked break I will continue to enjoy life here in south GA (Valdumpster holla) with my fiance...
Do you think Playboy will ever do a big girls edition? If so, I'm all over that!
PS I usually don't like to talk about my clients, but just to illustrate the differences between the races...my gay, black, female client wants to gain weigh so she can be "thick" like me (yes, she called me thick at our session today) because she thinks she is too thin and I want to be thin like her because life isn't fair! She eats like crap and doesn't exercise and has 2 kids and has a much better body than me...I guess the grass is always greener on the other side...lol.
PPS I am officially a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and can now start looking for a job in Boston!!! Oh, and I'm getting married!!!!
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Gran Torino and funny conversations
Current mood: contemplative
Paul and I have seen some good movies lately...Marley & Me, Bride Wars, and tonight Gran Torino. I have to admit I was not that thrilled about going, but since Paul so graciously took me to see Bride Wars I felt that, in the spirit of compromise, I needed to take him to see Gran Torino.
Whoa...
It was a truly fantastic movie. You know that when you are leaving a theater and everyone is absolutely silent that the movie touched people way down to their souls.
So, I sent my mom, dad, and sister a text message that said "Gran Torino is sooo good and sooo sad."
From this my dad calls and leaves me a voicemail about how he just got my message...um, yeah dad because I just sent it 2 minutes ago.
So, I call him back and he says "Oh, you're driving home? Are you having problem with the Gran Torino?"
So, I say "What?"
My dad thought my text meant that I was driving in a Gran Torino and having problems with it and was stuck on the side of the road. Hmmmmmm....luckily one of his friends was with him and explained that Gran Torino was also a movie.
But people who know what completely random associations I make should now understand where I get that trait from...poop rolling down the road anyone? A shark's tooth on a deck of a cruise ship...I mean bird poop?
Anyways, it was a truly moving, spectacular, change your outlook movie. Go see it!
Monday, April 12, 2010
Running away...from my fat!
So, I haven't been to the doctor yet to try to talk them into checking my thyroid. I know it's a long shot that I actually have a thyroid problem--it's actually more that I have an eating problem, but hey ya never know!
Tonight after work Paul went running and I went slogging. Is it normal for the outside of your thighs to hurt while you run? I can actually feel my saddlebags flapping against my legs. And I particularly enjoy the fact that my stomach bouncing up and down forces my pants to roll down. When I go to the gym I watch all these women with flat stomachs doing sit ups and crunches and I think mean thoughts about them. Paul wants me to run a 5k series with him and I'm practicing by using the Couch to 5k program; however, I may never reach the 5k when I can't get off week 1 of the program! And I only screamed once during my slog when a dog ran out from someone's driveway. lol
But the important part, I guess, is that I exercised. Now if I could only get my eating under control!
Tonight after work Paul went running and I went slogging. Is it normal for the outside of your thighs to hurt while you run? I can actually feel my saddlebags flapping against my legs. And I particularly enjoy the fact that my stomach bouncing up and down forces my pants to roll down. When I go to the gym I watch all these women with flat stomachs doing sit ups and crunches and I think mean thoughts about them. Paul wants me to run a 5k series with him and I'm practicing by using the Couch to 5k program; however, I may never reach the 5k when I can't get off week 1 of the program! And I only screamed once during my slog when a dog ran out from someone's driveway. lol
But the important part, I guess, is that I exercised. Now if I could only get my eating under control!
Friday, April 9, 2010
It's Friday I'm in love....
So let me tell you about my Friday....
We had a global management meeting for our company...an hour away. I somehow ended up being late to meet Greg and Alberyi even though Greg was meeting me in the town I live in. We get to the meeting at 9am...in time for an hour of registration and continental breakfast. The day starts off slow (with all the VP overlooking the massive change that our division has gone through and recognizing every other division, but ours), but I did enjoy the keynote speaker who spoke on the multi-generational workforce. He was really dynamic and interesting. Lunch was fairly good and after lunch they divided us into 3 groups. The purpose of the groups was to do an exercise on leadership style. They put 4 different styles up around the room and told us to stand in front of the style that best describes us. My supervisees quickly determined that I was green so I stood in front of green. It's not easy being green. Green is having high expectations of self and others, value competency, others see me as being overly critical of self/others, critical thinking, thirst for knowledge, comfortable with rapid change, don't often feel the need to ask for support, curious. Even the other people that I work with who were in other rooms pegged me as green. I supervise 2 oranges (enjoy the excitement and challenge of testing limits, spontaneous and fun, need for variety, interdependent and autonomous, rarely ask for support even when I know I need it).
Fast forward to the end of the meeting and raffle drawing time. We each were given a raffle ticket when we got there in the morning. My team leader assures me that he always wins these things. The 2nd number they draw...mine. And let me tell you I yelled and ran up front like I had just been chosen for The Price is Right. And the guy running the raffle was also the same man who ran my group and he said "Tell everyone what color you were." And I, with much embarrassment, said "Green." Who cares though cause I won a $50 restaurant gift certificate! And then I threw my ticket into the bucket and he says that no, I do not get a second chance to win but that I'm supposed to draw a new ticket. So, I get back to my table of all people I work with are making fun of me for squealing (remember when they tell the guy in Deliverance to squeal like a pig....totally the sound I made) when Diane, who I supervise, has her ticket called, screams, runs up, and messes up the next number drawing. I said to our team leader, "Does it worry you that I supervise Diane and that we're both on your team?" And then our office TOTALLY CLEANED UP ON THE RAFFLE. So we got no recognition in the morning, but won probably 90% of the raffle prizes. Sweet! And I got home by 4pm.
Then Paul and I attended the Chiefs Recognition Ceremony on base. While Paul chatted with the Lt. Col at our table I became BFF with all the enlisted people at the table (1 from Texas, 1 going to Ft. Lauderdale on vacation with his wife--I planned their whole trip, and 1 who briefly worked at MacDill). Ever since I became involved with Paul I cry at every ceremonial thing we got too so the entire night I'm trying not to cry (National Anthem, POW/MIA ceremony, video of honorees, etc.) The fact that my spanx were cutting off my circulation didn't help, nor did the wine I was drinking because I am definitely a drunk cryer.
The guest speaker was Retired Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force Robert Gaylor and he was awesome. He is going to be 80 next month and I leaned over to Paul while he was talking and said, "I'm in love with someone else." I asked Paul if we could adopt him. He was hilariously funny (at the end said his wife yelled downstairs to him to run upstairs to make love to her and he replied I can do one or the other, but not both) and so inspirational. He joined the Air Force in 1948 and has been married for 57 years. He was the 5th Chief Master Sergeant of the entire Air Force in 1977 and retired in 1979. I think my entire reason for coming to Boston was to hear him speak and to meet him tonight. I wish I had had my camera so we could've gotten a picture with him.
Of course I had to have an introduction to him after the ceremony (remember I'm the same girl who almost had a stroke just being in the same room as the Kappa Delta National President...I'm very easily impressed) and Paul wanted to go ask a 1st Sergeant something. So, we are talking to this 1st Sergeant and she is intense and awesome and she is talking about working out and I am saying how I need to work out and she offers to let me come work out, but alas she works out at like 4pm so I say I'm at work at that time and she says if I name the time she'll be there even on weekends (this woman has a 17 year old and a 2 year old...WTF). Oh, did I mention how Paul knew her...she was a drill instructor when he went through basic training! Jillian ain't got nothing on her! There is a good chance she will make me cry and throw up all at once. And now I'm obligated because she said she'll harass Paul if I don't go meet her. I'm scared. Paul said he could see me going down a path he knew I wouldn't like and yet he continued to just let me talk. I don't know why he lets me talk to people as I always end up situations I don't want to be in! And he laughs!
So, now we're at home and I'm enjoying my rum and coke while Paul drinks his Jack and coke and I'm contemplating my future work out and my ghost hunting tomorrow night. I may write out my will tonight because there is a chance I'll have a heart attack tomorrow night.
All in all a very good Friday!
We had a global management meeting for our company...an hour away. I somehow ended up being late to meet Greg and Alberyi even though Greg was meeting me in the town I live in. We get to the meeting at 9am...in time for an hour of registration and continental breakfast. The day starts off slow (with all the VP overlooking the massive change that our division has gone through and recognizing every other division, but ours), but I did enjoy the keynote speaker who spoke on the multi-generational workforce. He was really dynamic and interesting. Lunch was fairly good and after lunch they divided us into 3 groups. The purpose of the groups was to do an exercise on leadership style. They put 4 different styles up around the room and told us to stand in front of the style that best describes us. My supervisees quickly determined that I was green so I stood in front of green. It's not easy being green. Green is having high expectations of self and others, value competency, others see me as being overly critical of self/others, critical thinking, thirst for knowledge, comfortable with rapid change, don't often feel the need to ask for support, curious. Even the other people that I work with who were in other rooms pegged me as green. I supervise 2 oranges (enjoy the excitement and challenge of testing limits, spontaneous and fun, need for variety, interdependent and autonomous, rarely ask for support even when I know I need it).
Fast forward to the end of the meeting and raffle drawing time. We each were given a raffle ticket when we got there in the morning. My team leader assures me that he always wins these things. The 2nd number they draw...mine. And let me tell you I yelled and ran up front like I had just been chosen for The Price is Right. And the guy running the raffle was also the same man who ran my group and he said "Tell everyone what color you were." And I, with much embarrassment, said "Green." Who cares though cause I won a $50 restaurant gift certificate! And then I threw my ticket into the bucket and he says that no, I do not get a second chance to win but that I'm supposed to draw a new ticket. So, I get back to my table of all people I work with are making fun of me for squealing (remember when they tell the guy in Deliverance to squeal like a pig....totally the sound I made) when Diane, who I supervise, has her ticket called, screams, runs up, and messes up the next number drawing. I said to our team leader, "Does it worry you that I supervise Diane and that we're both on your team?" And then our office TOTALLY CLEANED UP ON THE RAFFLE. So we got no recognition in the morning, but won probably 90% of the raffle prizes. Sweet! And I got home by 4pm.
Then Paul and I attended the Chiefs Recognition Ceremony on base. While Paul chatted with the Lt. Col at our table I became BFF with all the enlisted people at the table (1 from Texas, 1 going to Ft. Lauderdale on vacation with his wife--I planned their whole trip, and 1 who briefly worked at MacDill). Ever since I became involved with Paul I cry at every ceremonial thing we got too so the entire night I'm trying not to cry (National Anthem, POW/MIA ceremony, video of honorees, etc.) The fact that my spanx were cutting off my circulation didn't help, nor did the wine I was drinking because I am definitely a drunk cryer.
The guest speaker was Retired Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force Robert Gaylor and he was awesome. He is going to be 80 next month and I leaned over to Paul while he was talking and said, "I'm in love with someone else." I asked Paul if we could adopt him. He was hilariously funny (at the end said his wife yelled downstairs to him to run upstairs to make love to her and he replied I can do one or the other, but not both) and so inspirational. He joined the Air Force in 1948 and has been married for 57 years. He was the 5th Chief Master Sergeant of the entire Air Force in 1977 and retired in 1979. I think my entire reason for coming to Boston was to hear him speak and to meet him tonight. I wish I had had my camera so we could've gotten a picture with him.
Of course I had to have an introduction to him after the ceremony (remember I'm the same girl who almost had a stroke just being in the same room as the Kappa Delta National President...I'm very easily impressed) and Paul wanted to go ask a 1st Sergeant something. So, we are talking to this 1st Sergeant and she is intense and awesome and she is talking about working out and I am saying how I need to work out and she offers to let me come work out, but alas she works out at like 4pm so I say I'm at work at that time and she says if I name the time she'll be there even on weekends (this woman has a 17 year old and a 2 year old...WTF). Oh, did I mention how Paul knew her...she was a drill instructor when he went through basic training! Jillian ain't got nothing on her! There is a good chance she will make me cry and throw up all at once. And now I'm obligated because she said she'll harass Paul if I don't go meet her. I'm scared. Paul said he could see me going down a path he knew I wouldn't like and yet he continued to just let me talk. I don't know why he lets me talk to people as I always end up situations I don't want to be in! And he laughs!
So, now we're at home and I'm enjoying my rum and coke while Paul drinks his Jack and coke and I'm contemplating my future work out and my ghost hunting tomorrow night. I may write out my will tonight because there is a chance I'll have a heart attack tomorrow night.
All in all a very good Friday!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Chicken
Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge chicken. I become terrified after scary movies (the other morning I felt the sheets moving behind me and I was convinced it was the demon from Paranormal Activity--even though logically I knew it was probably the cat it took me 5 minutes to turn around because what if the cat wasn't there and it was the cat in case you were worried) and when I watch crime shows like Criminal Minds I just wait to be murdered in some horrific way.
Occassionally I walk the dogs down a service road through a conservation area behind our house. The road ends at an old gravel pit. Cars can't go back there, but people ride dirt bikes, etc. back there. I constantly tell myself that it can't be too scary because teenagers go back there to play (or smoke pot or make out or whatever tweens do now). And even though our 80 lb boxer is a huge chicken, too, I have to believe she'd protect me if the need arose.
But my good friend Emily sends me an article today about how they found someone's skull in the woods outside Boston! Really Emily???? Now there's no way I'm gonna walk down that stupid road through the woods. I already look for murdered people on my normal walks...my eagle eyes are going to be in overdrive expecting to see dead people around every tree stump and hollow.
I think it always pays to be careful and I hope that I do practice good safety (I always have to yell at Paul to lock the doors behind him--he is not careful). So, I hope you all are staying safe, too, and making smart decisions. Pay attention to the people around you (I always make eye contact with people and say hi to them because I want them to know that I see them and I heard people are less likely to attack you if they think you've seen them).
I did go slogging tonight (aka slow jog) and Paul met me after his run. I was proud of myself because I feel like I'm getting a cold and I still went!
Time to shower and bed! Sleep tight my peeps!
Occassionally I walk the dogs down a service road through a conservation area behind our house. The road ends at an old gravel pit. Cars can't go back there, but people ride dirt bikes, etc. back there. I constantly tell myself that it can't be too scary because teenagers go back there to play (or smoke pot or make out or whatever tweens do now). And even though our 80 lb boxer is a huge chicken, too, I have to believe she'd protect me if the need arose.
But my good friend Emily sends me an article today about how they found someone's skull in the woods outside Boston! Really Emily???? Now there's no way I'm gonna walk down that stupid road through the woods. I already look for murdered people on my normal walks...my eagle eyes are going to be in overdrive expecting to see dead people around every tree stump and hollow.
I think it always pays to be careful and I hope that I do practice good safety (I always have to yell at Paul to lock the doors behind him--he is not careful). So, I hope you all are staying safe, too, and making smart decisions. Pay attention to the people around you (I always make eye contact with people and say hi to them because I want them to know that I see them and I heard people are less likely to attack you if they think you've seen them).
I did go slogging tonight (aka slow jog) and Paul met me after his run. I was proud of myself because I feel like I'm getting a cold and I still went!
Time to shower and bed! Sleep tight my peeps!
Saturday, April 3, 2010
How you know you married the right person
Most of you probably know that Paul is my second husband. I never planned on getting married again and neither did Paul I think. It was one of those things that just happened between us and very spontaneously we decided over July 4th weekend to get married the next holiday weekend aka Sept. 5th, 2009. To be fair we had gotten engaged because I did feel strongly that if we were going to have kids that I wanted them to have one last name and we also got more money from the Air Force for being married (okay, that's not the greatest reason to get married, but that extra money is nice).
My first marriage...well, I just wasn't ready to be married. My exhusband is a great guy, great person, but not the right person for me. He did not get my "specialness" at all. And I knew if I ever was going to be in a long term relationship with someone they had to get my "specialness." Paul totally gets my "specialness." He will freely admit this, too. In fact he tells me all the time how "special" I am. lol
But being married to Paul I am reminded every day how lucky I am to have such a great husband. That's not to say that we never disagree or get on each other's nerves...we do...pretty regularly, BUT we move on from disagreements quickly, too.
Today Paul spent the day...SHOPPING with me. He even sat patiently reading a newspaper so I could get a pedicure. In fact he insisted that I get the pedicure because I didn't want to make him wait for me. All in all we had a great day together (just like we always do). He waited while I tried on clothes and shoes...in 3 different stores. And he went to Panera Bread for lunch without complaining (cause it's not his most famous restaurant).
I definitely married a keeper and I am glad that all the drama and awful relationships in my 20's led me to this point in my life.
You will know you have married the right person when you can freely put his needs above yours, when he puts your needs above his, and when the two of you want to spend your time together just because you're best friends.
My first marriage...well, I just wasn't ready to be married. My exhusband is a great guy, great person, but not the right person for me. He did not get my "specialness" at all. And I knew if I ever was going to be in a long term relationship with someone they had to get my "specialness." Paul totally gets my "specialness." He will freely admit this, too. In fact he tells me all the time how "special" I am. lol
But being married to Paul I am reminded every day how lucky I am to have such a great husband. That's not to say that we never disagree or get on each other's nerves...we do...pretty regularly, BUT we move on from disagreements quickly, too.
Today Paul spent the day...SHOPPING with me. He even sat patiently reading a newspaper so I could get a pedicure. In fact he insisted that I get the pedicure because I didn't want to make him wait for me. All in all we had a great day together (just like we always do). He waited while I tried on clothes and shoes...in 3 different stores. And he went to Panera Bread for lunch without complaining (cause it's not his most famous restaurant).
I definitely married a keeper and I am glad that all the drama and awful relationships in my 20's led me to this point in my life.
You will know you have married the right person when you can freely put his needs above yours, when he puts your needs above his, and when the two of you want to spend your time together just because you're best friends.
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