The Truth Comes Out

On Thursday night we had parent night at the toddler's new school.  As we sat there in shock that we are actually old enough to have a child in school (granted she is only 2 1/2 but we expected her not to attend school until age 4).  Since we already had a babysitter with the girls (and for those that know me know that this is a HUGE deal that I'm leaving my girls with a sitter) we decided to go out to dinner. 

AT 8 O'CLOCK AT NIGHT!

As we walked onto the downtown mall in shock that we were going out to dinner AT 8 O'CLOCK AT NIGHT I felt a strange sense of my being my old self.  The pre kids self. 

Over dinner though the husband revealed something so shocking that I am not sure how I can look at him the same way. 

When we first moved to MA we didn't have air conditioning in our house and during the day our house would get hot.  So hot that our poor boxer would get sick and throw up/poop in her cage almost every single day.  The husband would usually get home first from work so he got the honors of cleaning out the cage.  Keep in mind an 80lb boxer needs a big cage. 

Except some days the husband apparently would get home, see that our boxer had gotten sick, decide he couldn't deal with it, and he'd go sit in the Walmart parking lot and wait for me to get home and clean the cage! What!  Really? 

Can you imagine me hauling a giant dog crate full of shit out of our front door so I could wash it out? 

I just looked at him and shook my head. 

And then because we had never been out after dark since we've lived in VA we totally missed our neighborhood on our way home and drove right past it! 

Toddler School

We took the toddler to her new school today to meet her teacher.  And by school I mean we are paying a crap ton of money for her to attend a toddler program for a total of 10.5 hours a week.  Granted the toddler is super excited, but I may be more excited.  I may or may not have been counting down the days to the start of school since I enrolled her minus the days I had total anxiety about her going to school and being out of my sight and what if there's a crazy shooter or an earthquake or...you know...crazy mom shit.  Thank God for zoloft is all I have to say.  Oh and wine.  Thank God for wine. 

Anyways, I'm not gonna lie.  I think the thing I am absolutely most excited about is that they are going to potty train her.  They don't know they are going to potty train her, but I am going to lie and say we are potty training her and then let them do their school magic.  All of my friends who send their kids to daycare swear that it works.  Those bitches better not be lying. 

Of course I have no doubt that the husband will have to bodily remove me from the premises the first week we drop her off and the school may end up calling the police on the mini van that's been sitting in their parking lot all morning.  And there may be crying.  Not on the toddler's part because she was ready for us to leave her today within 30 seconds of us walking into her classroom. 

I'll let y'all know how we do. 

Thirty-One

I did it!  I drank the Thirty-One kool-aid!  I became a consultant just this past week and I am so excited to share my latest adventure with y'all!  I am anxiously awaiting my enrollment kit and already have my first party happening.

As always there is a great special this month.  Check it out!  You'll love it!

Let me know if you'd like to be added to my Facebook group so you can keep up to date on what's going on with Thirty-One and any specials I have as a consultant.  

And the next person who orders through me will receive free personalization on any one item!

Happy shopping!

Shoo Fly

I have never had so many flies in my house as we've had since moving to Virginia.  Part of the problem is that the toddler runs in and out of the balcy aka balcony and leaves the door open, but I also think there are just a lot of flies in Virginia.  I actually heard someone say it was just that time of year.

The flies in the house are driving me crazy and to top it off we are apparently hosting a family of fruit flies as well.  I tried leaving a cup of red wine mixed with a little sugar out. Nothing. I tried carniverous plants. Little bastards must not be hungry. Finally the hubby went to Lowe's a couple days ago so I asked him to get some fly paper and a fruit fly trap.  He dutifully did and I set both up before bed with the excitement of Christmas Eve, just knowing that I would come downstairs in the morning to find that a massive fly genocide had occurred.

The next day I come downstairs and there is not 1 stinking fly on the stupid fly paper and the fruit flies are hanging out on top of the fruit fly trap like they are at Beaches Family Resort soaking up the sun and drinking mai tais.  Are you freaking kidding me?  Where was my fly genocide???? 

And to make matters worse I ended up killing 2 flies and 2 fruit flies with my bare hands!

While the fruit flies are still on their family vacation, the fly paper did manage to snag 1 fly and 3 fruit flies whereas this morning I killed an additional 2 flies with my hands. 

You can just call me Fists of Fury!

NC and Hummingbirds

Before we left Boston we took the toddler to the butterfly garden.  To be far I had also taken her when she was much younger, during hubby's deployment, but she probably doesn't remember that.  You know because she was like 5 months old.

I love a good butterfly garden.  Heck, I love a bad butterfly garden.  I think butterflies are just such beautiful bugs creatures.  When I saw how much the toddler loves them, too, I was super excited to build a butterfly garden with her at our new home in Virginia.

Being slightly busy with moving and a newborn and unpacking we sort of missed the the prime plant season, but were able to get a few annuals for window boxes.  Virginia has so many butterlies!  And flies.  What is with the flies????

I also decided we would try our hand with hummingbirds.  Saturday morning we were out on the balcony watching the hubby load up the swagger wagon for a trip to NC and THERE WERE HUMMINGBIRDS AT OUR FEEDERS!!!!  I almost peed myself with excitement.  Since then I have been obsessed with watching for hummingbirds and I told the hubby not to be surprised if he comes home one day to find the balcony covered in feeders. 

We went to NC for a friend's 19th annual pig pickin.  Yes, you read that correctly.  They have been doing this for 19 years, starting the first year they were married.  Hopefully when the hubby retires and we settle in one location we can start a similar tradition.  Heck, maybe I'll just start it now and whoever comes will have to travel to attend when we move.  haha  If you aren't from the south, a pig pickin is where a whole pig is cooked on the grill all day and you basically do just what the name implies...pick your pork right off the pig.  When I say it tasted amazing I am not lying.  This was the BEST bbq I have ever attended.  Amazing people, amazing fellowship, amazing food.  The hubby had met some of the 100+ guests, but it was the first time I had met the family and I fell in love with them.  I actually hope they adopt me (even if they are NC State fans).

The toddler, of course, made herself immediately at home.  And when I say immediately I mean she followed Curtis into his house while we unloaded the van.  No stranger danger with our girl.  The toddler pretty much ran around like a maniac, the baby was held, and the hubby and I were pretty much not needed by either of them.  I'll tell you what those kids were so wore out it was the best night sleep we've had in forever.  I'm going to drop them off the next time we go on vacation.  I don't even care which family member they stay with.

And I learned how to make greens finally!  I am sure the hubby is relieved because we've had some pretty awful attempts and finally last night I used some tips Ms. Emma had told me and they turned out so well. Ms. Emma is Curtis' mama and she has her own bbq in a few weeks with the same huge number of guests.  We were trying to figure out how we could politely invite ourselves just because we love this family so much and, we can't lie, we like to eat and the food was delicious. 

Had to represent FSU

All the toddler needs to be happy