Bath shower what?

Our little girl LOVES the shower. As soon as you turn the water on she's trying to climb in and usually is successful. She's young and fast, we're old and slow. She doesn't care how cold or hot the water is. Our shower is a pretty good size and I'm pretty sure she thinks of it as her own personal splash pad. I may have contributed to this because when she does shower with me I let her play in there while I dry off, get dressed, brush my teeth, brush my hair, put on make up. Ya know what don't judge me. It works.

Yesterday I didn't want her to climb in the shower as we were getting ready to leave the house so I had the bright idea to put her in the tub.

She had a baby with her and everything was going well until I felt a change in my water pressure. Uhh I looked out and Emma apparently had decided her baby needed a bath because she turned on the water.

Sigh. I turned off the water and quickly finished my shower. I'm certain that little stinker was thinking that she got me. Good thing she's so cute!

Bath tub baby containment fail.

The Great Pumpkin

All I have wanted for 3 years was to grow pumpkins. I constantly tell Paul and everyone who'll listen that my plan for when Paul retires is to open a Christmas tree farm, pumpkin patch, and petting zoo. Oh and did I mention I want to keep bees and maybe some alpacas (federal tax credit ya know).

So my pumpkin vines have been out of control growing, tons of flowers, but no pumpkins. Sad!

Then yesterday I went out to pick tomatoes and saw it. What I thought was a watermelon is actually a pumpkin! Praise Jesus I'm so excited! Of course there was a happy pumpkin dance involved.

Pumpkin patch here I come!!!!!

My arch nemesis

Emma has been super into her "babies" aka dolls lately so we decided to order her a couple more off of Amazon along with the bottles that have the milk and orange that disappear.  While searching for doll accessories I came across the following baby bed, high chair, and sink.  It was only $15 and I thought Em would enjoy it.  For some reason I expected it to come in one piece, but it wasn't.  You know how plastic toys come attached to each other so you have to twist them or cut them to seperate them.  That's how this came, but I thought I have my masters how hard can it be to put together.  Hahahaha

It took me 30 minutes just to get all the pieces separated.  The next 30 minutes I spent trying to assemble the ends of the cribs to the front and back of the crib.  The directions that came with it was just pictures, no words.  Beyond impossible to understand.  After much swearing and sweating and failure, Emma woke up from her nap and I gave up.  

We came back from running some errands and I was determined to finish this project!  I could not be beat by a $15 piece of plastic!  I got a different screw driver.  Did I mention there were 16 screws and no screw holes, only holes in the plastic?  I finally got 2 pieces screwed together and started to understand the pictogram that I was following.  When I say understand I meant that I just kept looking at the picture of the assembled product on the box to see what pieces went where. 

Em decided she should help me and/or play with the doll bed as I put it together.  Super helpful that girl of mine.  When she wasn't trying to steal the screw driver or throw screws all over the room, she actually did help by pulling the small plastic pieces apart.  Probably safe and child friendly I'm sure.  Mother of the year right here.  At least I stopped her from stabbing our Boston terrier with the screw driver. 

After much more sweating and another hour I finally felt done.  It was no longer falling apart except I had 1 screw left over.  1 screw.  Hmmmm...I examined the toy and 20 minutes later found the final screw hole.  My arms were shaking from the effort of getting those stupid screws into the non screw holes.  What did I expect for $15 is the question I should have asked myself during those whole process.   



But to watch Em play with it and see how much she enjoys it, well, it was all worth it.  

Those Parents

You'd never known we spent the last week sick.   What a busy day!  First off because it was Paul's day to get up with Em she didn't wake us up until 7:40!  You know since tomorrow's my day we'll be up at 5:40.  Sigh.  After breakfast Paul left to volunteer at a veterans fundraiser.  The weather was a little iffy and by iffy I  mean sprinkling when Em and I headed over around 9:30am.  I have had the worst headache that last 2 days and when I texted my doctor she wrote back, "Ugh.  Probably lupus."  WHAT!  What kind of response is that?  Lawdy.  I forced myself to stop at Starbucks on the way to the fundraiser as I haven't had coffee in a couple days because of the flu and even though I only drink half caf voila headache gone.  I guess my body was missing its coffee fix. 

My intention was that we would not be at the fundraiser that long.  There was not a lot of activities for Emma's age to do and yet we somehow ended up spending 2 1/2 hours and $30 there.  What did I spend $30 you ask?  Good question.  It was $5 to get it.  I bought a $3 iced coffee.  $12 on a deliciousness called Mountain Morsels (and it was healthy).  Um, $9 on hot dogs and lemonade (sweet peanuts).  And I'll tell you what.  Em has her appetite back in a way you'd think we were starving her.  Not only did she have a waffle for breakfast, in the time we were at the fundraiser she ate a fruit snack, cereal bar, Mountain Morsel sample, chips as in chips and salsa, AND a foot long hot dog.  She is fo sho our daughter.  Poor thing.

When we first got there we noticed there was no one in the bounce house.  How often do you see a bounce house with no kids in it?  To be fair we were also the first people there other than the volunteers, but still.  We noticed that the bounce house was wet and by wet I mean puddles of water had formed small rivers on the seams.  Most people probably would not have put their child inside.  Not us.  We took Em's shoes off and threw her in.  Paul went in with her.  30 soaking wet minutes later and I'm changing Em's clothes in the middle of a field.  At least I had an extra set of clothes.  Of course it meant that she no longer had on her cute pink outfit and now in her child ID card we had made today she is wearing a Bucs onesie and looks like a boy, but whatevs.  A bucs onesie, jean shorts with flowers on the hem, and hot pink sneakers.  Poor girl has a mother with terrible fashion sense.  How young is too young to be on What Not To Wear?

We got home and it was nap time followed by a trip to the new Orange Leaf that opened in our town.  Yummy!  So clearly I am feeling better.  We decided to stop by the park after our "healthy" candy topped froyo. 

This guy and his 2 year old son were playing in the sand box.  Em was playing near them.  The guy started to fill sand into a fish shaped toy and flip it upside down. Em thought this was great fun and wanted him to do it over and over and over.  Where were Paul and I you ask.  Sitting at the picnic table talking.  Yup.  Parents of the year.  Of course later we also found a piece of wood chip ground into her molar...you know because she had eaten some. 

Eventually Paul did get in the sandbox while I ran over to pick up some Chinese food.  I've been searching all day for something and I found it next door while waiting for our food to be ready.  Blue Moon Pumpkin Ale how I've missed you!  Someone had posted on FB that fall beers were out and he was right.  It was glorious I tell you!  First comes fall beer and then football and then fall leaves and then candy corn and Halloween and Thanksgiving.  Ahhhh bliss!  Of course if it wasn't still 9000 degrees outside I might could be a little more excited about fall, but I know it's coming.  It has to.  Summer is NOT my favorite time of year.  Yes, I enjoy cook outs and eating outside, but mostly it's just hot.  I hate being hot. 

And the liquor store guys invited me to their wine tasting next Saturday.  It's free so you know I'll be there.  And I got a FB friend request from a guy in high school.  No, not a guy I went to high school WITH, but actually a guy who appears to still be IN high school.  I'm not sure what about my profile prompted him to friend request me as he's not someone I know nor do we have any mutual friends.  My milfiness perhaps.  Don't be jealous.  And try not to choke while you're laughing right now.

We've also learned tonight that we will need to hire someone to potty train Em or she will wear a diaper forever.  She's pooped in the tub, and she's pooped in our toilet, but tonight she started to poop in the tub so I whisked her out and put her on her potty to finish.  While I finished cleaning the poop out of the tub Paul wiped her tooshy.  I turned around and he's yelling, "It's on my finger."  As he's trying to clean poop off his finger and not throw up, Em is trying to reach into her potty to grab the poop, and I'm trying to grab Em to stop her.  Then as Paul finishes cleaning her, I start cleaning out the potty and it wouldn't come out and it was so gross.  I'm gagging, trying not to throw up.   Blagh!  Clearly we are ready for potty training.  Poor Em.  They allow diapers in elementary school right?

Then Paul tells me that this afternoon he picked something up off the floor in the living room with his fingers that may have been a piece of poop.  Or it may have been a piece of dog food.  We are going with dog food since he picked it up with his fingers.  Lest you think we are disgusting human beings I did vacuum the living room floor yesterday and the basement floor this morning. 

Hope y'all are having a great weekend.  I think it's time for me to hit up da tub (remember when it used to be da club) with my book and a bottle of Blue Moon.  Ciao!

 

Shark Week

Have y'all been watching Shark Week?  I wait for it every year sort of like waiting for the Great Pumpkin and then when I watch it I have nightmares for weeks afterwards and won't swim in the ocean for months.  Luckily I live in Mass where you have to pay $25 to park at a "beach" which is mostly comprised of rocks.  People from Florida are beach spoiled I'll tell you what. 

Anyways, we watched the start of Shark Week the other night in the hospital and I had some observations I'd like to share. 

First off, did y'all see the first show?  I think it was called Air Jaws Two or something.  Let's talk about some things here.  Basically this team of film makers and scientists went to photograph great white sharks breaching the water during seal hunting/feeding.  They did this last year and apparently had to top the shots they got last year (which they got from putting a camera on top of a seal decoy).  Their solution was to build a tiny little inflatable raft on top of which a person lays down with a camera so they are almost at water level.  Behind this tiny inflatable raft they tow a seal decoy.   I wonder if they drew short straws or odd man out or just hey, we don't like you so we're putting you in shark's way to pick that sucker.

So, they are going along and from what I could gather this man has spent the entire day laying on this tiny inflatable raft (how did he pee?) towing the seal and waiting for a shark.  At the very end of the day the shark known as Colossus finally takes the bait so to speak and jumps out of the water. 

How pissed do you think Colossus was to realize he'd been screwed out of a tasty seal dinner?  Who do you think he's going to blame when he realizes it?  Um, how about the crazy guy on the tiny inflatable raft. 

Then I thought how are they going to top this next year?  Paul and I discussed this at length and realized the answer is obvious.  They are going to have to build a steel cage inside a seal carcass and then a man is going to have to get inside it to wait for the shark to attack so they can get the shot.  I mean what other choices do they have at this point? 

I really feel these shark people are crazy.  I'm all about saving the sharks and exploration of the seas and what not, but the only way I'd ever get in the water with sharks is if you threw my dead body off a boat. 

What's your favorite part of Shark Week?

Chaos

Friday we got home from Stroller Strides and poor Em felt really warm.  I took her temp and it was 102.7.  I wasn' t super worried because she didn't have any other symptoms.  She pretty much had a fever all weekend.  

Snuggling with daddy

Yesterday Em woke up and sounded super congested in her chest.  She still had a fever so we decided to just go ahead and go to urgent care.  The nurse listened to her chest and said oh she sounds fine.  The doctor listened to her chest and thought she sounded rattly (okay, those may not have been his words) and sent us for a chest x-ray.  The radiologist said no pneumonia.  The doctor said he thought she had the start of an ear infection and the start of pneumonia.  He prescribed an antibiotic. 

Last night as we were getting Em ready for bed Paul thought her breathing was very labored.  I agreed that she seemed like she was breathing very fast and very shallow so we headed to the ER.  We got there just after 7pm.  The ER doc (the hospital has an ER for peds...very nice) said Em had croup.  I went to get some vending machine snacks and walking down the hall brought me back to when we used to go there weekly during my pregnancy.  It was like coming home and made me nostalgic.  I miss our MFM and L&D friends.  A little after 8pm Em had a breathing treatment and then later on some meds.  We had to wait 3 hours after the breathing treatment to make sure it worked.  Keep in mind Em goes to bed at 7pm.  It is now after 8pm and she was just given a steroid.  Holy craziness.  She bounced around for awhile and then cried for awhile and finally fell asleep crashed out on top of me.  Thank goodness the room had a tv and we could've even watched a movie (they had a library of movies to use) so I got to see the opening of Shark Week (another blog on my Shark Week thoughts later).  I think we finally got home around midnight and after some fussing Em fell asleep in the big bed with us.  Or should I say on mommy.  

Fussy Em this morning

She cried and cried and cried even though she didn't have a fever (hallelujah) and finally fell asleep on top of me.  It wasn't so bad.  I had peed already, I had a fresh cup of coffee, AND had The Real Housewives of New Jersey on the dvr.  I was set for the long haul.  The dogs were outside and one of them was barking which made me want to rip my ears out a little bit (I thought pet ownership was supposed to be therapeutic?  My dogs barking makes my blood pressure sore!).  Things were going well until Em started coughing. 



Coughing led to vomiting...right down the front of mommy's shirt. Oh...my...gawd! Soooo gross!  Upstairs we went and straight into the shower.  The whole time I was peeling my bra full of vomit off of me and over my head (gag) I was thinking about how my husband was probably at a relaxing lunch at a restaurant at that exact moment in time.  Don't worry.  I texted him. 

After we both got cleaned up and Em got some play time in the McArtor splash pad aka mommy's and daddy's shower, we went back downstairs to watch tv and find something for lunch.  I finally went to let the dogs in.  One dog ran in, another dog ran in, a third dog ran in from the woods after several minutes of me yelling, and the fourth dog ran across the neighbors yard.  What?!?!  We have a fenced in yard and both gates were closed so we either had a breach in the perimeter or our boxer had grown wings and flown over the fence.  I finally got her wrangled back into the house and put the towel across the bottom of the door (we had a mouse that had outsmarted Paul's attempts to catch him.  Unbeknown to me, the mouse had been caught that morning except it wasn't a mouse, it was a mole).  As I was standing up I hit my head on the doorknob.  Really? 

This is the series of texts between me and Paul:

Me: I'm covered in puke.  Enjoy your lunch.

Me:  There is a hole in the fence somewhere.  All dogs recovered.  Feel free to come home early.  Did Em have diaper rash this morning?  It's super bad.

Me:  Also hit my head on the door.  May have a concussion.

Paul:  I love you.

Paul:  What r ur and Emma's shirt sizes?

Em and I ran to get take out from Panera of which she ate 2 bites of bread and 1 noodle from her chicken noodle soup when we got home.  I was up changing her diaper and who shows up but Paul.  Things were calm at that point, but he said  he read my text messages to his co-workers and they made him come home. 



Em finally fell asleep on the living room floor until she started coughing and threw up

Oh hey Jojo

Of course when Em is sick she wants nothing to do with Paul for the most part so his coming home early consisted of all of us watching Goonies while Em napped and played and Paul played on facebook.  He did fix the fence so the dogs could go out (and God bless him cause there is no way I'd be tromping through our wooded property looking for a hole in the fence).  It was nice to have him there especially when Em threw up again.  Vomit is always better shared, don'tcha think?  Why does baby vomit smell so so bad?

After dinner we threw Em in the stroller and went for a walk.  We have a follow up with our pedi tomorrow and hopefully a nice, relaxing day.  haha 

The Real World

I have reached a new low in my reality television watching. There is a ton of stuff I should/could be doing, but instead I am watching The Real World St. Thomas...on demand. I am probably dating myself here, but I remember when the Real World originally came on...you know, back when MTV actually played music videos and had vjays. Raise your hand if you remember those days.

So now that we are all sufficiently feeling old let's talk about The Real World.

The first Real World was broadcast in 1992...I was in high school. We can thank MTV for the reality tv show craze. Yay. Although seriously thanks MTV. Can you believe 1992 was 20 years ago???? Holy crap.

I digress. So Real World New York...Eric, Heather, Julie, Kevin, Norman, Becky, and Andre. For some reason when I think of the Real World NY I think of an episode where Julie and Heather were walking Norman's dog and the dog ran and Heather fell down.

But do you remember when the cast members had actual conversations about things that mattered like racism, and homelessness (remember when Julie sept under the bridge with the people who were homeless), and homosexuality. Do you remember how seriously gross Puck was/is??? I just threw up in my mouth a little thinking about him.

I was pretty faithful to the Real World up through 9 seasons (Hawaii was my fave..shout out to Amaya), but then it seemed it had degenerated into the show it is today and became all about hooking up and sex and drinking (much like Jersey Shore).

I think I totally could've rocked the Real World though. Of course the shows I would've been eligible to be on were London, Miami, Boston, Seattle (do you remember the crazy girl with Lupus), or Hawaii. After that I would've been out of college and too old (Mike from Jersey Shore hear this YOU ARE TOO OLD TO BE THAT SHOW, same goes to you Pauly D).

You know what show I really wish they'd bring back...Paradise Hotel. I was beyond obsessed with this show...like posting on boards obsessed.

And I now have wasted 30 minutes of my life looking up these cast members on google. Sigh. I need to get a life.

Ok, I'm turning off the tv. haha

Cutest Baby on the Block

The picture of Emma with our boxer Sasha...if her leg looks like its in a downward trajectory it's because she just kicked Sasha in the chest. Such a gentle soul is our little girl.

Hope you enjoy these pics! Happy almost Friday!!!

Hmmm what does God know that we don't?

Took Em in her baby pool yesterday.  She enjoyed it for about 1 minute less than it took me to fill it up with an inch of water.  She then climbed out, wanted to go over to her play climber, played on that for about 30 seconds, and then crawled (wet mind you) through the dirt to get to her Sasha.  She is now covered in dirt and Lord knows what else (the area around our deck is more sand pit than lush grass) and I realize I've forgotten a towel.  So I throw her back into the pool to rinse off while she screams.  I then carry  her screaming and kicking into the house, trying not to get myself soaking wet, (did I mention that I had put the dogs into the unfinished part of the basement during all this and walked in to find Sasha trying to eat a mouse trap) where I have to use one of the towels we keep in the basement for the dogs to dry her off. 

Later on I think perhaps I should jump in the shower since I told a friend I'd take her to the airport and I was pretty stinky from the gym so Em and I head upstairs.  I turn the shower on, start to get undressed, look over, and Em has crawled fully clothed into the shower.  The water wasn't even warm  yet!  So I strip her down and let her play in there while I take a shower.  We might need to go to the splash pad this weekend.  haha

So, over dinner my nice and clean baby takes a slice of pizza and rubs it into her hair and then proceeds to rub it over the side of her neck, ear, face.  Paul and I just stared at her. 

We've been trying, unsuccessfully, to have a second child.  I looked at Paul last night during the pizza perfume party Em was having and said, "God's probably saying look I know y'all think you want to have another child, but trust me on this.  This one is gonna be a handful." 

Paul laughed and said, "Yup.  He's thinking she's a good baby now, but just you wait." 

I have a bunch of pictures on my phone so after I post this I'll post some pics separately.  Cause I'm narcissistic enough to think y'all are super interested in seeing pics of my baby.  haha  She's just so stinking cute!

The Suit

This is the bathing suit that I bought on sale at Land's End a few weeks ago. Notice it is a bikini. Also notice that it hangs in my dining room, next to our kitchen table, in full view of the kitchen. Be aware that while the suit "fits" (if we use the term fit very loosely), no one deserves to have to see me in it (think before model on EVERY diet drug commercial ever). My goal is to be able to wear this bikini with confidence NEXT summer. I don't think I've worn a bikini in 5 years. Wish me luck!

Those Were the Days

Saturday Paul, Emma, and I went to a cookout at a military recreation spot near us. It's for military and their dependants and it's on the beach in Cape Cod. We'd never been and wanted to check it off our New England bucket list so when I found out they were having a surf and turf cook out I signed us up.

I wasn't sure what to expect because military stuff is sort of hit or miss...either great or awful. Surf and turf cook out was GREAT! It was a beautiful day, the covered picnic area overlooked the ocean, and for $25 you got a whole lobster, a steak kabob, a baked potato, a corn on the cob, a roll, cole slaw, clam chowder, watermelon, and strawberry shortcake for dessert. And it was sooo good!

I think we were the youngest people there, but we sat with the nicest couple (he was retired army) who were staying in a cabin there. They let us use their cabin to use the bathroom and get changed into our bathingsuits after we ate which I thought was amazingly nice. Of course they were from Atlanta and it was felt so good to have lunch with some good ole southern folks. And explains the letting strangers use their cabin.

I am wicked nosy and was curious to see the inside of the cabin. It was definitely nice and I think we'll be trying to go for a weekend at the end of the season.

The beaches up here leave a lot to be desired. I guess if you're from the north and it's all you know then they are good enough, but if you're from Florida then they are disappointing. They are very small (no miles of white sand), you have to cross a rock barrier to get to the water, and the water is full of rocks and it's cold! Did I mention the great white sharks? That's why we want to go back at the end of the season. We figure we aren't swimming anyways and the cabin has a fireplace.

So, when we were sitting on the beach with all our beach toys, playing with Emma, fat bellies hanging over our bathingsuits, me in my tankini there was a huge group near us playing corn hole. They were probably in their 20's, all fit, all tanned, drinking beer, having fun, and as I watched them I thought those were the days. I remember those days! Where did they go?

Then I look at my Emma, covered in sand, with her swim diaper making her bathingsuit into a thong, eating whatever she can find on the ground (yum sand) and I know with all my heart that I wouldn't go back to those days for nothing. And I was so happy for those 20 year olds because they are having the grand time that they are supposed to be having right now, but I was even happier at the grand time I'm having right now.

Congratulations!

Congratulations to Katie Kent for winning the Mission Possible giveaway! She is a teacher who is returning to teaching after being a stay at home mom the last 5 years. Enjoy your end of the summer reading!

Mission Possible

When asked to answer the following "Stagnation, being unable to accomplish one's job at a high level, is one of the greatest sources of low teacher morale. Why do you think this country treats teaching so differently than other professions?", I really had no idea how to answer. I hadn't ever really thought about the question before. Yes, I have many friends who are teachers. Yes, I had worked within the school system as an academic instructor at an alternative school for kids who are expelled, as an outside consultant teaching substance abuse, and as a school social worker. The experiences I had working within the system were varied. I saw good teachers, mediocre teachers, and teachers so burnt out that working retail may have been a better option for them than teaching.

And so I read Mission Possible by Eva Moskowitz and Arin Lavinia. I'll admit that at first I was wondering what I'd get out of this book. I don't work anymore. I'm a stay at home mom, but I am concerned about what kind of education my daughter will get when she is old enough to attend school. Even though I was compensated for this post, all opinions expressed are my own.

I didn't expect to be so blown away by what they are accomplishing at Success Academies or so appalled by the state of education in our country. We often think of failing schools as belonging to those districts filled with minority or low income students, but the Success Academies clearly show that economics and race are NOT a factor in education or they shouldn't be anyways. These are schools in the Bronx and Harlem and for the 2012-2013 school year they expect 15,000 parents to enter a random lottery for 1200 spots.

What do they do that is so different from a traditional education? They hold parents accountable. Parents are required to sign a contract promising to participate in their child's education. They believe strongly in rigor, not only for their students, but for their teachers as well. They wear uniforms and believe everyone has the right to respect for self and others. They believe their students are much more capable than a traditional education does and their dedication to literacy and writing demonstrates that. Students as young as kindergarten are participating in science experiments! Principals are involved in ensuring that their teachers are well trained and feedback is immediate.

I can tell you that I didn't see many of these things occurring in the schools I worked in. To be fair, I did work with challenging populations of students, but we allowed them to skate by academically and I never felt supported by my principal. She seemed so overwhelmed and stressed by the pressures put on her by the school district that there was no way for her to provide helpful feedback. Most teachers work hard and want to do a good job. Our society's value of them should reflect that. A school system should value its teachers enough to help them excel.

I think change is possible within our education system. I think, as a society, we need to value teachers more, and I think teachers need to value themselves more. I think we need to stop allowing states to force teachers to teach to the test and to come up with new and innovative ways to engage teachers, students, and parents in the education process. Teachers need to stop hiding behind the unions and start standing up for what is fair by demonstrating they are capable of excelling. Principals need to be supportive of their staff. The state education system needs to stop feeling threatened by the charter schools like Success Academy and start learning from them.

Anyone who works within the education system needs to read Mission Possible. Within 3 years of opening Success Academy Charter Schools, they have emerged as one of the top schools within New York City and State. Mission Possible describes what happens when teachers, students, and parents are held to high standards and when they work together for the benefit of all involved. If you have seen Waiting for Superman or The Lottery then you know how much is possible when teachers are allowed the resources they need to excel. There are also take aways at the end of each chapter for principals, teachers, parents, and school reformers as well as a DVD.

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