The Situation

Could "The Situation" from Jersey Shore be any more skeezy? Now I know I may be slightly behind on my Jersey Shore as I don't watch the episodes when they originally air instead catching the reruns whenever nothing else is on. So I'm home on bed rest and catch this episode where "The Situation" calls this girl he met at da club last night who had come over and left her number on his door. (on a side note...Sami really you're still sleeping with that skeezer Ronny? I have more respect for a sea snail than you at this point)

My initial point of contention with "The Situation"...your stupid ass self proclaimed nickname! If a guy ever came up to me and introduced himself to me as Situation I would laugh hysterically and walk away. You are 29 years old. 29! Really dude. Your parents must be sooooo proud. Of course they are from Jersey so there is a good chance that they are proud. You used to have a real job. What happened to you? Strike 1.

So anyway...he calls this girl and his opening line is "Hey baby." Um, you just met last night. Strike 2. So then he asks her if she wants to go out with them tonight and tells her to meet at the house at 11pm and then they can have a sleepover when they get home from da club. If this girl finds that sort of line to be a turn on then she is as skeezy as he is. Strike 3.

And GTL...what the hell is that? At 29 years old you are tellng me that your only purpose in life is gym, tan, laundry (oh and meeting skankopotamuses and slutosaurases). It must be hard to have such a grueling personal schedule that leaves you little time for say, oh I don't know, contributing to the world in a meaningful manner.

Now some of you may be questioning what this says about me that I sit at home and watch this crap. I really have no defense because you are right. It's sort of like watching a train wreck. You want to look away, but you can't. Also, I am on bed rest. I cannot be held responsible for my tv choices right now.

On another side note...why do these girls dress like they shop at Skanks R Us? Not everything in your wardrobe needs to be made of a lycra and spandex blend or come 3 sizes too small. Surely they get paid for this show and their appearances and what not...are you telling me they can't afford to buy better clothes? Well, perhaps not since going out drinking on a nightly basis can be quite expensive. All that liquor and GTL must cost money.

And my final point of contention...Snookie's hair...she looks like a troll doll. Who on earth told her that was a good look for her? I am the 1st to admit that my hair looks like ass pretty much 90% of the time. Mine is out of sheer laziness though. Snookie intentionally makes her hair look like that. Like that is her going out, damn I look good look. It makes me wonder what kind of animals may be nesting under that hair poof.

Okay, enough Jersey Shore. Time to heat up my deli meat in the microwave for lunch. Yum.

Paul's going to be a gourmet chef by the end of my bedrest

Paul lucked out yesterday. I had put a chicken in the crockpot in the morning thus saving him from having to cook dinner after the ob told me no more cooking. Tonight though...whole different story.

I took a steak out of the freezer to defrost while Paul was at work, he stopped and bought french fries, and I had gotten asparagus at the grocery the other day. Let me walk you through the steps.

Paul gets home. He lets the dogs out. I push a chair over so I can see him in the kitchen. First step is to get a pan out for the french fries. You'd think that would go well except we have an extra drawer inside our pots/pans drawer which had gotten stuck on the handle of the pans below it. So after fighting with that Paul gets the pan out. Next step is to get the oil out and put it in the pan. Paul looks at me blankly because he has no idea where the oil is. lol Oil and french fries go into the pan.

Paul gets out the asparagus and then halves it and then walks around the kitchen with a bunch of asparagus in each hand. So, I gently tell him to just put half back onto the empty bag it came in so he can wash the bunch we are going to eat. Steak and asparagus go onto the broiler pan and Paul's next step is to drizzle olive oil over the asparagus and season everything. I use olive oil that comes in a huge square can that's like $30. Paul did well though at this!

Food goes into the oven and a lively conversation about how to turn the stove and timer on ensues.

All in all Paul did a great job cooking his first dinner for us! I think at the end of 21 weeks he will be an absolute pro at it! I love my hubby!

I died and went to chocolate heaven

Today I got to experience pure chocolate nirvana aka the Chocolate Buffet at the Langham Hotel in Boston. The Langham seems like your standard nice city hotel and at first glance the Cafe Fleure seems like your standard nice hotel nice restaurant seating area. Our waiter came to inquire as to whether we wanted coffee, tea, or a chocolate martini, wine, or a mimosa. I would've loved any of the latter, but settled for hot tea (I did opt for full caffeine though...I'm wild and crazy like that).

From your table you get up and enter another smaller room (but still quite a large room) that has low lighting and a DJ! Oh, and tables upon tables of chocolate as far as the eye can see. There was someone making cotton candy, crepes, truffles, a chocolate fountain, chocolate bread pudding, chocolate creme brulee, tons of different chocolate mouses in the cutest tiny cups, a chocolate/bacon tart, and anything else you could imagine. It was decedent and delicious and like being in Willy Wonkas for the rich and fabulous.

I overheard one of the staff saying that this has been ongoing every Saturday for 22 years and is sold out every weekend. Knowing what we paid for our buffet I can only imagine how much money the hotel makes off this little slice of chocolate heaven. But knowing that this isn't something I may ever do again it was definitely worth the cost.

I may have gained 12 lbs today and developed diabetes, but it was sooooo worth it!

Military life

So, my hubby texts me today and says "How would you feel about pcs'ing to Spain in the spring?" Um, hell yeah! I get so excited that of course I tell everyone at work "I'm moving to Spain!" Of course he then says "well my report date would be Feb. 10th." Hmmmm...moving to Spain 7 days before my due date may be ill advised and living in a foreign country with a newborn plus if Paul deploys next summer...I think my parents would kill Paul if he took their grandchild away from them as soon as she is born!

Having married someone in the military and being new to military life I had never really thought before about the sacrifices military families make. While I think getting to move every few years is actually pretty cool and exciting, it also sucks to have to leave your friends/family/job every 3 years. To be fair I usually leave my jobs every year and a half to 2 years, but still...You get really good at saying goodbye. You have a TON of Facebook friends because you are always meeting new people.

The sacrifices military families make are tremendous.

We have friends who have gotten married and who have yet to live with their spouse because they are stationed at different bases in different states.

We have friends who only got to spend days with their newborns before they deployed or who weren't there for the birth of their child. Children give up their time with their parents so that their parents may protect other people's countries.

Military spouses are strong. They carry the burden of the family while their spouse carries the burden of the country and they do it with a smile on their face even when they feel like crying.

Separations aren't the exception...they are the norm.

Your family becomes the people who are stationed with you, new friends that you meet through the military that you would never have known otherwise and yet you spend holidays and special occassions together.

But...you meet amazing people, you see amazing places that you wouldn't have seen otherwise, and you develop amazing pride in our country. Every time I hear a patriotic song or the National Anthem I tear up now because I now know what those songs mean. I now know the people who those songs are written for. And I feel gratitude every day for the blessings in my life.

All things Jersey

I am not sure what the rest of the countries current obsession with all things Jersey is...and by rest of the country I mean me.

Real Housewives of NJ--has far surpassed OC as my favorite housewives...minus Danielle who I think is a wackjob. As much as she is a nutjob and annoying as all get out and you can physically watch her ruining her children with her borderline personality I am torn between wanting Bravo to NOT renew her contract for next season and seeing what drama she can bring back. Although I do think the rest of the casts obsession with her is pretty annoying. I also think Theresa is a wackjob and it cracks me up that she passes judgment on Danielle without any insight into her own craziness. I love the Manzos though...all of them!

Jersey Couture--Even though I think this dress store has the most hideous dresses I've ever seen I think this family is hilarious! I have no idea when its on or what channel its on because I always watch in On Demand, but I hope its on again next season. The 2 sisters have great clothes themselves, or at least I think so, and I always want to know where the one sister gets her clothes (as she is kind of chunky like me).

Jersey Shore--I don't even know what to say. This reminds me of the Real World except with the same cast. The most awful thing about this show are The Situation and Pauly D because they are a 150 years older than the rest of the cast! If you are 29 and 30 years old then you are TOO OLD to be on an MTV reality show with 22 year olds. Isn't that some kind of pedophila? Plus they are so unattractive. Seriously, does anyone think these men are attractive? Ronnie does actually remind me of a guy I briefly dated before Paul. Musclehead, alcoholic, crazy...what was I thinking???? I vomit in my mouth a little each time I think about it. Don't as me why I know the names of all the cast members. I swear I have only seen half an episode on 2 occassions.

Jerseylicious--Why don't these girls wear pants? I've only ever seen any of them in hot pants or mini skirts. If your shorts are so shorts that your pockets hang out below the hem then they are too short! I thought I might be able to get into this show, but I just don't think I will be able to. Literally I think the one girl is walking around in a white tank top with a hot pink bra with only black panties on underneath. No way are those shorts! And the arguing...oy vey! Why would you go get your hair cut here when all these people do is fight and talk bad about each other????

I currently work in the North Shore and the girls there seem to use the Jersey Shore as their fashion idols. It cracks me up!

All this being said...I would beat someone up for a Taylor ham and cheese sandwhich on a hard roll. And only my Jersey peeps will truly know what I'm talking about. And there is also this deli by where we lived that has the BEST German potato salad. I don't think I can convince that a 4 hour each way day trip just for these items is a good idea though. haha