Tattoos

When I went in for my cerclage this time the anesthesiologist made a comment about already having my back marked for the spinal.  Marked?  Oh, right.  The tattoo on my lower back.  The infamous tramp stamp.  Something that seemed so cute and sexy when I was 21 and 50lbs thinner.  I know some people prefer scroll type work on their lower backs.  I went with the also popular Chinese symbols.  It's supposed to mean princess.  I'm pretty sure it actually says "I'm an asshole."  There's also a butterfly to round out the symbols. 

To add to the hot and sexy aka drunk and slutty that were my college years I also have a fish on my right side near my bathing suit line and the ever so tired ankh on my left shoulder blade.  I remember walking around campus in my little tank tops with my ankh showing thinking how cool I was.

Oh, how wrong I was.  I did not perceive of the present physical reality I now find myself in.  I could not conceive of weighing almost 200lbs (some of you may say "but wait you're pregnant", but I'm here to tell you I've only gained like 2lbs since I've been pregnant because I am THAT overweight).  That tiny guard suit I used to wear when I lifeguarded would fit Emma better than it would fit me right now.  And by fit me I mean I might be able to get one leg into it and that's about all. 

My sexy tattoos are sad reminders of my youth.  I sometimes look in the mirror and wonder what they'll look like when I'm 40, 50, or 70 years old.  If I don't get some of this weight off after baby #2 you might not be able to see them anymore.  Perhaps that would be best. 

Nothing says hot mess like your tramp stamp looking like it's the Michelin symbol on a spare tire. 

I have to admit though I am sometimes tempted to get another tattoo.  I'd like to get my anniversary and my children's birthdays tattooed on the back of my upper neck, near my hairline, in roman numerals.  Its something I've thought about for a long time.  Something that is hidden when my hair is down, almost like a secret that only I know about it.  Then I wonder am I too old? 

I have friends who have their noses pierced (the cute, tiny diamond like studs NOT the freak of the week, lead a bull around the yard, rings) and I've always thought that was super cute, but I definitely feel too old to get that done for the first time at age 35.  Also, I'm pretty sure the hubby would NOT be happy about it. 

So, what do you do when your physical age does  not match your mental age?  Other than the fact that physically I sometimes feel more like I'm 95 than 35, mentally I picture myself as still being 25.  I forget that perhaps I've outgrown the ability to get a tattoo or a piercing.  To be fair I also think getting my  nose pierced would hurt A LOT.  I'm not sure I'd be able to handle it. 

So, what do you think?  When are you too old to tattoo? 

At least I can take comfort in knowing I have numerous identifying marks should the police ever need to locate my body.