Sleep Deprivation

I am pretty sure my daughter has been recruited by the government to perform secret science experiments on me in sleep deprivation.  Granted this suspicion may be fueled by my sleep deprived psychosis, but you never know. 

I used to think Em was a great sleeper.  Sure she only slept in 20 minute chunks during the day and sure in those 20 minutes (if I was lucky 3 times a day, but usually 2) I would run around like a lunatic trying to get laundry, dishes, dinner, etc. done.  I would like to thank all the people who told me to sleep when the baby sleeps because that truly is a great piece of advice....if you have narcolepsy and can fall asleep inside of 60 seconds so that you really benefit from that 20 minutes the baby is asleep.  The few times I've actually tried to sleep when the baby sleeps I am just falling asleep when she is waking up and ready to play and then I feel worse than if I hadn't napped at all.  But she was a good night sleeper and I felt blessed in that.  She didn't cry and she went right to sleep.

Since we've been in FL Em has become a terrible night sleeper.  Granted she was sick for 2 weeks so that was rough and now I think she is teething, but how does she know the exact second I lay my head down to go to sleep to choose to wake up unless the government is somehow controlling her?????

So last night I decide to go to bed and I actually got an hour of sleep in before she woke up...at midnight...crying.  Yay.  I give her some baby Tylenol and I am exhausted and I just need her to go back to sleep so I nurse her (I know, I know.  It's a terrible habit, but I am exhausted.  Don't judge me.).  At which point I fall asleep and wake up an hour later, boob still her in little mouth, having no idea where I am, but she is asleep.  So I gently climb off the bed, pick her up, lay her gently down in her crib AND she's wide awake and crying.  Are you freaking kidding me??????  I almost started crying with her.  So it's back out of the crib and onto the other breast and she finally falls asleep and I can get her back into the crib and she stays asleep.

Until 3:50am.  And it's more crying and I think holy crap am I tired.  So I bring her into bed with me, just let my boobs hang out, and let her nurse as much as she wants (cause did I mention she wants to nurse all night long now for some reason). 

Oh and at 7am it's like a tiny rooster inside her head starts crowing because no matter how little sleep or how much sleep she's gotten by 7:15am she is wide awake and it's time to start the day.  Which is super fun now that it's still dark out at 7:15am and feels like night time to me. 

I'd also like to thank people for the advice of give her a little rice cereal in a bottle before bed to help her sleep...this chunky monkey eats 3 huge meals a day AND nurses so I'm pretty sure rice cereal is NOT going to induce any kind of sleeping through the night. 

And we are not a cry it out family.  I tried.  I can't do it.  Em doesn't cry and fall asleep.  Em screams her fool head off until snot is running out her nose and she can't breathe and she's gasping for air.  That can't be healthy.  And then I have to use the boogie catcher and then she cries harder and it's a vicious cycle.  So no crying it out for us.  I did start reading The No Cry Sleep Solution and just have to start keeping the logs so maybe that is our goal for this week.  I started the book when she was sick and that was obviously not the time to keep a sleep log because really who has that much paper (awake 20 hours, asleep 3 minutes). 

Paul thinks I'm joking when I tell him that I'm going to stay at a hotel when he gets home and leave him home with Em so I can get an uninterrupted night of sleep...And I'm not staying at no crappy Motel 6 either.  Boston has some nice hotels.  I'm going balls to the wall on this one. 

Gotta run.  My 20 minutes of freedom has ended and my tiny dictator has woken up.  God I love this hot mess that runs my life now.  :)