I Wish

"Once our eyes are opened, we can’t pretend that we don’t know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows that we know and holds us responsible to act.” -Proverbs 24:12 

I wish I could help.  I wish I could do more.  What can I do?  I'm just one person.

How many times have you heard these words?  How many times have you uttered these words?  If you are like me then these words have crossed your lips too many times to count. 

I never was the person who felt their biological clock ticking.  Even when I was pregnant I was unsure.  Having been with Emma now for 10 weeks this Saturday I can not imagine my life without her.  She has brought such joy to us that despite all the time and money and effort I've spent on school and obtaining professional licenses I really just want to be a mom now.  I want a house full of children to give kisses to and hugs to and snuggles with and love and to watch them grow and learn.  I sit here watching Emma sleeping next to me and I don't know how the love I feel for her is even contained inside me.  My heart fulls close to exploding it's so full of love. 

Every day that I mother Emma I feel the call from God to adopt getting stronger and stronger.  Every day I read another blog on adoption and I so badly want to help (147 million orphans).  I am not sure if I am going to be able to wait 7 years until Paul retires to start our adoption journey.  I pray that God leads Paul to be ready to adopt before then.  I did agree that we'd have one more of our own biological children before we adopt so in 2012 McArtor baby #2 will hopefully be making a much less exciting arrival (no we are not trying now...my ob said to wait, wait, wait and I agree). 

But back to Proverbs 24:12.  Did I mention there are 147 million orphans in the world and as much as I'd like to adopt them all I know that's unrealistic so what can I do to help be a positive person in the world before then?  I am pursuing more and more writing opportunities in hopes of sharing some positive messages in the world.  Maybe something I write will lead someone else to make their own positive changes in the world (adoption anyone?).  What can I physically do?  Although my life in 2011 will be in flux I am going to find some way to volunteer.  I am not sure where yet, but there has to be something I can do (my mom collects old sheets, blankets, and towels from hotels and takes them to animal shelters.  Maybe something that simple).  I also want to get credentialed with Tricare (our health insurance) to provide email and telephone counseling to military.  I have no idea how one goes about getting credentialed (feel free to tell me), but I hope to figure it out. 

So, what can you do to help?  If nothing else, lead people to my blog.  Follow me on google and share posts that touch you with others (is this conceited of me? I worry about sounding conceited by thinking anyone would want to read what I have to say).  Follow me on twitter (Jenn_uineLife), but don't expect too much there yet because I am still figuring it all out.  Read my articles on All Things Diva and comment.  Let me know if there is any thing you'd like to read about.  I want to grow and expand as a writer and would love suggestions. 

Thanks for letting me ramble on about my need to do something.  I hope you feel moved to do something, too.